The Queen of My Self


The month of elections and politics. Now’s the time for all good women to run for office! Women in power. Women speaking truth to power. Wise women rule wisely!

With the question of power — its uses and abuses — on my mind, I reached out to the Facebook fans of The Queen of My Self to see what power means to other Queens of Themselves. (Part 2 of 2, continued from Part 1, posted on Friday, November 10)

Q. What does power mean to you?

I posed this question in the last issue:

Q. And you, dear Queens? What does power mean to YOU?  Please send me your thoughts about power. Also stories of your own empowerment. When shared, these ideas and examples are extremely inspiring to others. Thanks.


A. Just perused the latest of your Queen’s Chronicles, and am inspired to write you about a powerful anthology put together by Sandra Haldeman Martz, At Our Core: Women writing about Power that is unfortunately out of print because the publisher crashed, but a number of copies are available through at amazing reduced prices: 17 new from yes! 35 cents, and 54 used from (yes) 1 cent. It was marketed new for $11.00, a bargain even then, with a stunning cover and 179 pages about women and power. Tragic that it’s no longer being marketed, but what a bargain at the above prices. Power to us Women People! Power to the Queens! Love you and all your productions,

– Karen, NJ


A. Empower = power in my Queen world.

– Miriam, CA


A. I have always felt that there is a strong connection between love of self, security in your self, power, love and gentleness, tolerance and understanding towards others. When you are strong and you know you are strong, you don’t need to prove it and you are thereby free and secure.

– Lorraine, PA


A. Power-

There are times when I have witnessed someone who is acting at the top of their compassion, intellect, spiritual service and ability to communicate. (Maturity level and physical strength are not factors here.) I get a feeling of pause as if to move would shift a current that would dissipate the aura, the perfection of the moment. To me ultimate power is in this synchronicity.

-Katherine, CT


A. I am powerful when I am centered and standing strong in my life’s purpose.

– Donna, OH


A. Watch out, world. Here I come!  A sassy gal who is determined to do what I want to do. I was a good girl for far too long!

– Mo, RI


A. Power is my Goddess-given right to live my life as a free agent.

– Saundra, UT


A. Power is being 100% yourself and not compromising based on what others want you to be, do or say. It is also not giving anyone else free rent in your head — which is essentially giving your personal power over to them!

Christine, OH


A. To thy own self be true

– Micklo, CA


A. A Queen’s power should be used to further her life’s path and to help along her sisters to do the same thing. We can do much to improve the lives of others if we use our power to do so.

– Katharine, Denmark


A. It means knowing how to access my life force energy, what activates it, what zaps it, and granting myself permission to do whatever it takes to stay connected to this inner fountain of youth! It is my chi!

– Daina, MI


A. To me power means being able to say the hard stuff with grace and non-attachment!

– Judith, NY


A. Responsibility.

– Ruth Ellen, England


A. Power is the life force within us and around us. And the ability to tap into it.

– Cristie, ND


A. In the mind of the Goddess (A Bitch) is a Woman of Strength, Power and Wisdom. Never take offense to this title of Queenship. And those who use this word are aware of its Goddess meaning. Blessed be the Woman who holds her own.

– Janel Oriana, NY


A. I KNEW someone would say “bitch!” It just reminds me of the well worn saying “Well behaved women rarely make history.” I had a conversation with a friend one day about Madonna who is one of my favorite examples of a powerful woman. I said I realized that she has a tendency to step on toes, act bitchy and make some doubt her sanity. I then realized I was one of those people, and I was perpetuating that view of a very powerful woman who has pissed a lot of people off with her creativity and confidence. I don’t agree with everything she does, but she does it well!

– Kimberly, IA


A. To me, true power is changing the world simply by the force of being exactly, only, and completely who you are.

– Carolyn, MA

Q. What does power mean to YOU?


If you have ever been called defiant, incorrigible, forward, cunning, insurgent, unruly, rebellious, you’re on the right track!

– Clarissa Pinkola Estés


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Donna Henes is the author of The Queen of My Self: Stepping into Sovereignty in Midlife. She offers counseling and upbeat, practical and ceremonial guidance for individual women and groups who want to enjoy the fruits of an enriching, influential, purposeful, passionate, and powerful maturity. Consult the MIDLIFE MIDWIFE™

The Queen welcomes questions concerning all issues of interest to women in their mature years. Send your inquiries to

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