We are intended to be in relationship with the ongoing movement of life. But when you look at life as though nothing will change, it won’t. The more you push away what you don’t want, the more you keep it in place. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xn8iQ8D8H_o&t=14s
Question: I once had a radical experience with my inner life. I got to a point where I knew something had to change. I told God that I was going to trust Him (whatever that meant, because I had no clue) no matter what it took. Right there and then, my life began to change. I began to have understanding about myself and others. I had a new boldness. Then, somehow, over time, I just lost it all. My question is this: it says in the Bible something like once enlightened, and you fall away, how do you expect to repent and be crucified with the Christ again? Is it too late for me to know this precious freedom that once found me?
Answer: Nothing in the Universe can stand in the way of the one who wants to let go of who and what they have been in favor of realizing themselves in the Light of God. And anything within you that intimates (or intimidates) otherwise… does so in the fear that you will rededicate yourself to realizing a conscious relationship with the Real Life that once touched you. Start over right now. In time, as Truth allows, you will come to realize that the living Christ is always being “crucified”… sacrificing His life for the sake of the (so-called) “other.” And one can choose that same path through life, anytime one remembers what really matters in life. God is love, and love is always doing what love does: bringing together what is apart and “making” it whole (holy). Act on what you love, not from what you fear, and watch how fear fades as love grows.