DoorMats go out of their way to please everyone, trying to be a perfect people pleaser. That’s what I did when I lived in DoorMatville. I was always trying to be the perfect little pleaser to insure that everyone would like me. But I finallyrealized that I didn’t get the pleasure from pleasing everyone that…

Being a DoorMat is a conscious effort to gain approval or security. But unfortunately many of us don’t get those results when we do our best to please everyone. That’s why so many DoorMats are unhappy.  I was rarely happy in my DoorMat days because of the negative emotions I’d develop when people let me…

Most of us have a hard time saying “no”, at least sometimes.  Since most of want to seem like being a “nice” person, it’s often assumed that saying “no” to someone who needs you isn’t “nice.” But that’s not true! Helping people when you can—when it works for you—is a much healthier version of nice,…

A desire to be nice drives many of us to be people pleasers. It can be hard to know where true nice ends and being a DoorMat begins. Many people have great misconceptions of what nice behavior is or they call themselves nice for the wrong reasons. The people pleasing kind of “nice” behavior often…

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