A common thread among clients who come to me for self-empowerment counseling is “Why do people use me?” And they groan, “Why me?” And they whine, “I’ll never get what I want because of _____.” I tell them to fill in that blank with, “because I allow myself to be a victim.” People don’t make […]
Today is Day 10 of my 31 Days of Self-Love posts to celebrate Self-Love Month with suggestions for jumpstarting your own self-love.
This is post 170 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to attract all that you need. I do it every day! Read all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series to see how.
DoorMats are really good at giving. We know that. But when we don’t love ourselves and go overboard pleasing for security, we usually give in a non-reciprocal way. When you feel lousy about yourself, it’s hard to receive help and support. Oh yes, it’s easy to give it so people will like you. That came naturally to me. But when someone offered to do something for me I’d immediately find reasons to say “no!” Accepting kindness felt wrong back in DoorMatville!
If I asked someone to recommend a handyman for a small chore I couldn’t do myself and the person would say he knew how to do it and would be happy to do it for me, I’d strongly explain it was okay for me to pay. If someone had an extra ticket to a ballgame because someone couldn’t go and invited me, I’d insist on paying for it, despite protests that it would have just gone to waste. If a friend offered to take me out for my birthday I’d insist on Dutch treat.
When you feel low about yourself, it’s hard to accept what you don’t feeling worthy of. When you don’t love yourself, you can’t easily accept love from others.
If you don’t allow yourself to accept what people offer you, you won’t get much. Refusing kindness is unloving and tells the Universe you shouldn’t attract it. The Law of Attraction picks up the message that you don’t think you deserve good things from others and you’ll attract less and less. This can reaffirm to you that you aren’t worthy and it becomes a very negative cycle.
You can change this by making a conscious effort to take things that are offered.
Learning how to receive is very loving! Do it one small thing at a time to get used to being on the receiving end. Enjoy what you get so the vibration you send to the Law of Attraction says you like getting kindness and want more. The more you accept kindness and enjoy what you get, the more you’ll attract, which says “I love me!” Self-love is nourished by allowing kindness into your life.
See all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series HERE.
Take the 31 Days of Self-Love Challenge–a pledge to do something loving for yourself for the next 31 days–and get my book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways for free at http://howdoiloveme.com. Read my 31 Days of Self-Love Posts from 2011 HERE.
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