My month-old son farts…a lot. I’m not talking an occasional discreet toot. I’m talking 12-hours-after-eating-a-bowl-full-of-hot-chili-and-beans fart; farting so loud and powerful it will wake him up from a deep sleep. If sleep apnia describes people who have trouble sleeping because they stop breathing, he has fart apnia.
We cannot quite figure out what is causing this problem. Kim is on a diet more bland than someone who has the had the stomach flu. Still, he farts.
I recall hearing that “bovine emissions,” aka, cow farts are a major source of greenhouse gasses thus leading to global warming (I’m not joking here). Cow farts produce methane and methane has been determined to be 23 times more “warming” than carbon dioxide. I fear for the cows. I fear for my son. In just the time I’ve been typing (and I type quickly) he as farted five times. The air in my room feels warmer. I don’t know what to do.

[Note – Some readers have inquired whether everything is ok and the answer is genuinely yes. He has an allergy to something in Kim’s diet plus he ingests a lot of air while nursing. He’s really fine, sleeps well, is gaining wonderful amounts of weight, etc. ]