The NFL season started Thursday night, with a marquee matchup between the Philadelphia Eagles and their bitter rivals, the Dallas Cowboys. 

Would Philadelphia get off to a good start defending their Super Bowl title from last season? Could Dallas pull an upset? 

But just as they were getting started – six seconds into the game – Jalen Carter, the star defensive tackle for the Eagles, was thrown out of the game for spitting on Dallas quarterback Dak Prescott!

Sports fans were rightfully shocked, but to be honest, this wasn’t the first time a player had spit on an opposing player. (Just last week, Luis Suarez of Inter Miami spit on a representative of Seattle Sounders after Seattle defeated Miami in the Leagues Cup.) That doesn’t excuse Carter’s behavior, of course, but it provides some important context. 

Specifically, while people often idolize their favorite stars (whether sports stars as in this case, or famous entertainers or political leaders), incidents like this one demonstrate an important fact: no one is perfect.

Parents, teachers, and religious mentors can use this as a teachable moment. But how?

First, remember that no one is perfect. People make “mistakes” – on many levels, and to many degrees. When situations like this occur, instead of excusing the behavior, it’s better to acknowledge that it was wrong. It’s hard to imagine anything more disrespectful than spitting on another person. Start from the perspective that the behavior in question was wrong.

But don’t stop there; the next step is to consider why it happened. Why did Jalen Carter spit on Dak Prescott? Several factors could have contributed to his actions. The video of the game shows that Prescott spit on the ground – perhaps in Carter’s direction – before Carter spit on him. That’s not an “excuse,” but it could be a factor. Also, the long-standing rivalry between Dallas and Philadelphia may have played a part. The teams play each other at least twice each year – three times if they meet in the playoffs. As the old saying says, “Familiarity breeds contempt.”

The nature of football in general also could have been a factor. Football is played by strong men; it’s a violent game. As someone once said, football is not a “contact” sport; it’s a collision sport. Accounts of the ways that players get “psyched up” before a game are legendary. 

That’s the second “teaching point”: people need to be aware of their surroundings and their circumstances, and the ways that those factors influence their emotions and behavior. For instance, if driving makes someone “edgy” – or even angry – what steps might they take to alleviate those feelings? 

From the spiritual perspective, incidents like this one provide the opportunity to remind children, students, and others to “fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith” (Hebrews 12:2). It’s natural to look up to sports heroes, entertainers, and other leaders, but remember that those people are “only human.” Cheer for their accomplishments when appropriate, but also watch how they deal with their failures. In this instance, Carter acknowledged that his conduct was unacceptable. “It was a mistake that happened on my side, and it just won’t happen again.” 

Public apologies are excellent teaching opportunities. An apology that “I was wrong, and it won’t happen again” demonstrates how to take responsibility for a failure. On the other hand, “I’m sorry if I hurt anyone” doesn’t fully acknowledge that the behavior was wrong; instead, the apology focuses on the result. “I’m sorry that my behavior came across wrong” is even worse; it shifts responsibility to the other person. Carter’s use of the word “mistake” might not be ideal (“mistake” can be used to describe unintentional behavior), but he took full responsibility and committed to not repeat his “mistake.”

Another important step is to broaden the focus beyond this one event, and consider other actions or statements that reflect on the person’s overall character. 

For example, the night before Super Bowl XXXIII, Eugene Robinson was arrested for soliciting an undercover police officer for sex. Worse yet, Robinson had been honored by Athletes in Action just a few hours before his arrest for his “high moral character.” Robinson’s actions were bad enough, but the fact that he held himself out as a devout Christian made them even worse. “So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall!” (1 Corinthians 10:12). 

Cheer for your favorite players and entertainers. Support leaders who support and share your values. Encourage your children to do so. But don’t forget players are human. And don’t ignore their failings. Their mistakes – and the ways they respond to them – can be excellent “teaching moments.” 

Unfortunately, sometimes the lesson is, “Don’t do what they did.” You can cheer for the team, or enjoy their music, but don’t follow their example. They didn’t admit what they did was wrong. They blamed other people. They looked for an excuse rather than acknowledging their failure. 

But other times, the lesson is more positive. Sometimes, the lesson is, “Look how they acknowledged their failure. They know what they did was wrong, and they’ve apologized.” Everybody makes mistakes. Nobody is perfect! Learn – and teach others – to acknowledge their mistakes, and to forgive others when they “drop the ball.”

 After all, Jesus taught His disciples: “When you pray, say…Forgive us our sins, for we also forgive everyone who sins against us” (Luke 11:2-4).