“You’re never going to win, Colleen,” says my husband.

I reply as I always do to those familiar words.

“If you believe there is winning and losing in love, then you have already lost,” I say.

It reminds me of two children walking off a playground.

“He pushed me,” says one. “No, he pushed me first,” says the other.

When adults walk off the playground, they say, “There is no excuse for my bad behavior.”

Part of growing up is accepting responsibility for our actions.

I am in a marriage where I am the only one accepting responsibility for the problems. I am the only one staying in marriage counseling.

I am struggling in this relationship. I am one person taking responsibility for two.

So much so, that I find myself saying, “I am growing weary of watching children walking around masquerading as adults.”

I will no longer allow another person to blame me for their bad behavior.

I am getting a divorce.

I am walking off the marital playground, covered in dust and dirt.

My husband can believe that he won.

Me………………I know that he lost.

 

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