Conflict is a normal part of every relationship. When it isn’t managed well, it can rip a relationship apart. Katie and Tim knew this, and were at a breaking point if things didn’t change. Every day there was a blow up over something. And during those blow ups, things escalated. Their emotions ran so high,…

As a licensed marriage and family therapist, I often talk about what it takes to build healthy relationships. But perhaps another question is, what does it take to derail a relationship? How do you push someone away? In other words, what contributes to becoming a bad partner?  Here are 10 points to consider. They are…

In doing couples coaching, I draw heavily on the three decades of research by John Gottman, Robert Levenson and colleagues at the Gottman Institute. This group has contributed much to our understanding of healthy relationships through their research with couples. Gottman describes couples as “masters” or “disasters” of relationships. As you would guess, “the masters of…

If you are on social media or listening to the news, you know there are a lot of upsetting things being said these days. But what about the upsetting things we say to our partners? For example, I remember arguing with my husband a few years back. In a moment of anger, I said, “You…

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