In August, Illinois Governor JB Pritzker signed a law requiring mental health screenings for all public-school students in grades three through twelve. At first glance, this may sound like a good idea—after all, who wouldn’t want to identify a child who is depressed and in need of support? But is mandating school-based screenings really the right way to address mental health?

This law raises important questions: Who will conduct the screenings? How will the information be used? And could this approach unintentionally pathologize children? These are not small concerns, and I am not convinced schools should be given this power.

The Risk of Over-Focusing on Feelings

When it comes to children, it’s not always wise to repeatedly ask, “How are you feeling?” Of course, I checked in with my kids’ emotions when they were in school, but I didn’t make their feelings the center of their functioning. My reasoning was simple: the more attention you give a negative feeling, the more it grows.

When I was a child, my grandparents would listen to what was bothering me, then gently say, “What are you going to do about that? Deal with it and move on.” They didn’t encourage me to ruminate, and that helped me build resilience. Likewise, when my mood was low, my parents would send me outside to play with friends. Exercise and social interaction were powerful antidotes to sadness.

Teaching Children to Regulate Emotions

Drawing from those lessons, I taught my children not just to name their emotions but to regulate them. The more constructive question is: When you feel down, how do you cope and work through it?

Feelings are fleeting and unreliable; they should not be the basis for decision-making. What children need is not constant labeling but the ability to tolerate distress, regulate emotions, and keep moving forward. These skills are at the heart of many effective therapies—and they are skills parents can and should teach. Schools should reinforce resilience, not pathology.

A Spiritual Foundation for Resilience

We also can’t ignore the spiritual dimension. The Psalms remind us to cry out to God and trust His goodness in times of distress. Sadly, much of our culture has lost that spiritual grounding. Parents must take responsibility to fill their children with God’s Word, so they are not left as “empty vessels” seeking fulfillment in unhealthy ways.

Building True Resilience

The bottom line is this: stop labeling children as fragile or pathological. Labels often make kids feel weaker, not stronger. Instead, we must teach them to face challenges, rely on God, and develop the confidence that they can overcome adversity.

Resilience also grows in community. Families and churches should come together to pray, encourage one another, and teach children that they can “do all things through Christ.” When we stop coddling children and instead equip them to cope, serve others, and practice kindness, we build a generation of overcomers—stronger in mind, body, and spirit.