A mom on Reddit sparked a debate after describing a recent meal with her extended family where she was criticized for giving her 3-year-old a tablet during the meal. The Redditor was having a meal with her child, her husband, her mother and father-in-law, and her sister-in-law. “My 3-year-old was getting cranky, and I could already feel a meltdown brewing. I tried crayons, snacks, everything. Nothing worked,” she wrote. After exhausting her options, she then offered up the iPad so she could watch cartoons. “She immediately calmed down and started eating,” wrote the mom, adding that it “felt like a win.”

Her mother-in-law, however, was not impressed. “Kids these days don’t know how to behave at the table anymore,” she noted, with the poster’s sister-in-law adding, “Back in our day, we didn’t need screens to sit still.” Even her husband thought she could have done something else before “giving in” to the tablet.

Many responded with criticism. “You should not give kids screen time when at a family meal. They need to learn to sit and chill … This is promoting bad habits,” wrote one person. “The dopamine hit and dependence on screen time isn’t ideal for developing brains,” wrote another. Others had some strong words against the other adults in the situation. “Why wasn’t your husband dealing with the impending meltdown, since he has so much to say about the matter?” asked one. “Your parents-in-law shouldn’t be judging you. They should be supporting you,” wrote another.

The impact of screen time on children’s brains has been a growing concern. Some studies warn that children miss out on valuable interactions with families if they use a tablet during meals, which can impact language acquisition. Other researchers insist on limiting screen time for young children and utilizing educational programs when necessary, rather than mindless cartoons. Debates on tablet use for children rage all over the internet, on Reddit and TikTok alike. A recent TikTok video went viral showing a father struggling with his young child as she climbs all over him. The video was captioned with, “fighting for our lives at restaurants to not make her an iPad baby.” One commentor applauded both sides of the iPad debate, writing, “No screen time = good parents. Screen time to save your own sanity = good parents. We’re all just out here trying to survive parenthood, no need to tear each other down.” Another applauded the dad’s efforts and offered encouragement. “My best friend did this with her kids and trust me girl it’s soooo worth it! They’re 7, 7, and 10 now still with no iPad and we see a HUGE difference in their behavior from other kids!!”