Beyond Blue

Wow! Have you guys read through all the comments on my “Plucking the Seeds of Anxiety” post? They were fantastic! They brought me the combined relief of two months of therapy, two bottles of Zoloft, five hard-core workouts, three weeks of support groups, ten phone calls to friends, and fifteen hours under my HappyLite.

In other words, thank you.

And I also have to thank my Beliefnet editor (Holly Rossi), a brilliant woman sent to me from God, who continually encourages me to be real–to write from where I am (even if it’s not pretty), not from where I hope to be. Whenever I follow her advice, it seems as though readers appreciate my candidness.

I’m always amazed by the power of support–the consolation in knowing that I am not alone: that plenty of others are trudging through the same mounds of animal waste that I am, that they are fighting similar wars inside their brains as I am, that they are fighting to stay positive, and to not lose it in front of the TSA representative at the airport who steals tubes of toothpaste from suitcases in an effort to protect this country.

I’m thrilled that this blog has become a support group to many people who, like me, are trying to live their lives as though they aren’t scared of another mental breakdown. Nothing makes me happier than to read that my words have helped a reader feel less alone.

In fact, so dependent on your feedback am I that I print all your comments (actually, just the nice ones) and place them in my SEF (self-esteem file). On my insecure days (29 days of the month), I go back and read them. Because they inspire me to leave my mask behind for one more day, and write from the most vulnerable place inside, where I’m scared to death of rejection.

Holly knows how important your comments are to my writing. So she copies the extra nice ones and sends them to me in an e-mail (in case I missed them) with a subject heading: “For your SEF.”

Thanks again for the additions to my file!

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