Eric strongly suggested I order of copy a “Reclaiming Desire: Four Keys to Finding Your Lost Libido,” written by Andrew Goldstein, M.D., and Marianne Brandon, Ph.D., cofounders of the Sexual Wellness Center here in Annapolis, Maryland (I can’t use the commuting excuse), where they specialize in treating women’s sexual health problems.

This is what I found out: an estimated 40 million American women struggle with diminished sex drives. Some health professionals believe that low libido and diminished sexual desire have become a new epidemic in our society. According to recent estimates, more than one-third of women in the United States have problems with their sex drives. And even that number might be low, because lots of people (I know some of their names) may be too embarrassed to answer personal interview questions honestly.

Orgasmic disorders (where women either have never experienced an orgasm, called primary anorgasmia, or seem to have lost their ability to experience one, called secondary anorgasmia) affect approximately 25 percent of the female population in the United States. Do you know what these women do as they are having sex? You got it. The old Meg Ryan act (from the infamous scene in “When Harry Meets Sally“), faking orgasm (for those of you who never saw the flick), which can lead to more-complicated problems over time.

According to my neighbors Goldstein and Brandon, here’s what’s involved in reclaiming your sexual desire:

“[It] is about finding the balance that is necessary for your life energy–your essence–to flow freely. Sometimes a blockage stems from a physical problem, like a hormonal imbalance in the body or a neurochemical imbalance in the brain (I’ve got them both). It might evolve from an emotional problem, such as depression (I’ve got that too) or low self-esteem (uh huh). A lack of intellectual stimulation (I read the paper) or spiritual fulfillment (I go to church) can dampen sex drive too.

Regardless of where a blockage originates, it can feed into other imbalances over time. Attention to all the elements that drive your life energy–physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual–is necessary for sexual desire to return.”

If you’re as imbalanced and messed up as I am, you interpreted those last two sentences like this: I’ll never ever orgasm.

Read on, though, because I looked long and hard for this paragraph:

“Rest assured, you don’t need to achieve absolute balance among the physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual components of your sexuality and your self in order to reclaim your desire (phew!). You can want sex again without resolving all the underlying issues that may be affecting your libido. For most women, the simple act of consciously and fastidiously attending to the need for balance is enough to bring about change.”

Hmmm. I don’t know about that. I guess I’ll try it. But knowing I’m a tad screwed up and wanting to do something about it have never made me horny before.