2017-07-27

The subject of sleeping in different bedrooms when you’re a couple was a very taboo subject to bring up. It was not part of dinner conversations, and if it was mentioned you got the stink eye, or a brow lift that the couple in question was in trouble.

Remember “I love Lucy,” where the couple had separate beds, since it was inappropriate to show them in bed together?

These subjects were not up for discussion separate beds or one bed in another room! If you look at the busy couples and their schedules, balancing kids—taking different bedrooms is good for emotional health, better sleep, and a way for people to cool off after a fight. Face it we all need our space and being on top of each other all the time makes for cranky people, so why not sleep in different bedrooms? 

It is not practical

The thought of drifting in each other’s arms and being comfortable for hours is a sad misguided notion. After a while you, need to switch positions. If there is a blanket hog, or you have someone’s knee pushed in your back—you end up going to the couch anyway. Not to mention if they snore, the dog snores, and if they talk in their sleep—you can’t get much sleep. People just give up on sleeping with their mate, as they’ve become sleep deprived. The only part of this scenario is not to make it a habit, since this will affect intimacy, and communication. But if you both communicate this to each other and are aware of this—it’s fine. Make sure you schedule some cuddle time.  Here are a few good things  when sleeping in other rooms.

Different preferences

He likes it warmer or she wants it cooler. The Better Sleep Council found that a mate’s sleeping pattern and habits hurt the quality of sleep. Lissa Coffey wrote that this is a major issue in relationships for the BSC. Ideally, your bedroom should be a cool 60–65 degrees Fahrenheit. But a few simple adjustments can make it possible for a person who craves heat and a person who craves cool to sleep side by side comfortably.”

Poor sleep

Not having enough sleep affects health, emotions, and makes you resent your partner for keeping you up at night. The Daily Californian reported on a study done by University of California-Berkeley in 2013. “A major cause of breakups is that one or both partners feel like they are being taken for granted. Studies have shown that people who appreciate and feel appreciated by their partners are more committed to their relationships and are less likely to break up,” head researcher Amie Gordon said. You can read more on the University of California-Berkeley’s study.

Different schedules

Both couples work more than ever today. If you are working different shifts, it is necessary to be in different rooms so you don’t disturb the other person. George H. Williams, PhD, is a marital therapist and said in a WebMD interview: "There's nothing at all wrong with sleeping apart," Williams says. "But it goes against everyone's myth that we should all sleep cuddled up together -- that's our ideal vision. And most people want to get back to that ideal."

Sleeping apart is better for your sex life

You will miss each other more and be more rested! This will lead to better intimacy along with a better mood. Do what is good for you not what the world expects you to be. When you find something that works for both of you—go for it. You’re not alone as one in 10 couples chooses to sleep in separate beds in Britain a report in 2012 shared.

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