Don’t be a martyr. What I mean by this is to let your family or close friends take care of you. If they offer, accept. And if they don’t, ask for what you need. I did. If someone offers to make your bed and comb your hair, let them! You will forever remember these acts of kindness and who was there when you needed them the most. Same goes for anything you are traditionally responsible for at the holidays—dinners, baking, presents. Some folks feel they should make the effort “for the sake of the family”—no one needs the reminder about “what’s different this year,” and others may not be sure how to be involved. Instead, allow others to pick up these responsibilities while you focus on cherishing the time you spend with them.