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The Queen of My Self

The Queen of My Self

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Dangerous Territory

posted by Donna Henes

Dedicated to Our Great Work in the world, and The Cosmic Cowgirls We are a tribe of truth tellers. Revolution makers. Movers and shakers of things that need moving and shaking. Like hips. And old ideas that need shaking off. […]

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The Back Story

posted by Donna Henes

It is now over ten years since the publication of The Queen of My Self. This anniversary has sparked introspection, provoked evaluation and evoked some amazing memories. Seizing My Sovereignty Back From Hostile Capturers I was, of course, thrilled when […]

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Life Begins at 42

posted by Donna Henes

Saint Hildegard’s Guide to Becoming a Midlife Powerfrau By Mary Sharratt We live in a youth-obsessed culture. The cosmetic industry pushes wrinkle creams and hair dye on us while celebrities resort to Botox and surgery to preserve an illusion of eternal […]

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How to Deal With Your Midlife Crisis

posted by Donna Henes

By Miriam Slozberg When you hear about someone going through a midlife crisis, you usually think of that stereotypical scenario of some guy in his forties impulsively buying a sports car and dumping his wife for a younger woman. Well, […]

What Not to Wear After Age 50: The Final Say

posted by Donna Henes

By Michelle Combs Google ‘what not to wear after age 50′ and you will have your pick of thousands of articles telling you what looks terrible on your old ass body. I want to point out to the writer who […]

No Country for Old Women

posted by Donna Henes

by Mary Saracino Howling from the mountaintops wailing from the riverbanks scooping the moon into their waning wombs the old women know that lies kill, distortions maim, hope isn’t enough to feed starving babies, school the ignorant, put and end […]

Becoming the Queen of Your Self

posted by Donna Henes

The idea that we might be Queens is intoxicating. Ever since I first started introducing The Queen as a helpful archetype for midlife women in my workshops and articles some eight years ago, I have received thousands of requests for […]

The Queen: A Model for Midlife Empowerment

posted by Donna Henes

Who are we supposed to be at this stage of our life when we are less likely to be bound and identified by our kinship connection to someone else — as daughter, wife, mother, lover? What exactly is our role […]

Hot Women

posted by Donna Henes

It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content — or steam, whichever comes first.  […]

Lost Drive?

posted by Donna Henes

It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content — or steam, whichever comes first. […]

Peaches and Cream – Part 2

posted by Donna Henes

It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content — or steam, whichever comes first. […]

Peaches and Cream – Part 1

posted by Donna Henes

It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content — or steam, whichever comes first. […]

Cougar Queen – Part 2

posted by Donna Henes

It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content — or steam, whichever comes first. […]

The Laughter Of Women

posted by Donna Henes

by Lisel Mueller The laughter of women sets fire to the Halls of Injustice and the false evidence burns to a beautiful white lightness It rattles the Chambers of Congress and forces the windows wide open so the fatuous speeches […]

Hot & Horny – PART 2

posted by Donna Henes

For the members of the Voodoo cults of New Orleans, St. John’s Day, June 24, was the most important holiday of the year. The main ceremony was a ritual dance called the Calinda, performed by the Voodoo Queen, Mam’zelle Marie La […]

Hot & Horny – PART 1

posted by Donna Henes

It is summer, hot and horny. We are surrounded, immersed, inundated by brilliantly bright light, pervasively palpable heat; pure and potent solar intensity — the very nerve and verve of life itself. We bask and steep in the positive, primal […]

Change It

posted by Donna Henes

I won’t be made useless I won’t be idle with despair —Jewel      From “Hands” The media likes to portray peace, environment and human and animal rights protesters as a fringe element of whining malcontents teetering on the margins […]

Speak Up!

posted by Donna Henes

It is so damn easy to feel depressed, frustrated and disillusioned right now. In light of the widespread oppression, manipulation, intimidation that surrounds us today, we most certainly need to say something. There are signs everywhere in the subways of […]

Noting the Process

posted by Donna Henes

The mental part of our Self is not satisfied with simply accessing our intentions and motives. Our minds want to know what they mean and how they affect us. Our conscious, rational aspect craves order, information, comprehension. We humans seem […]

Coming Home to Our Self

posted by Donna Henes

Here is a piece by Sister Joan Chittister, the popular Catholic spiritual writer. It landed propitiously in my mailbox whilst I was in the midst of working on these recent posts on the Self. http://www.benetvision.org/ Good timing, Sister Queen! Coming […]

What Does Being a Queen Mean to You?

posted by Donna Henes

Some time ago, I asked the Queens on my Facebook page what being a Queen meant to them.  Q. What does being a Queen mean to you? A. As a little girl I wondered what it would be like to be […]

Decide to Take Charge

posted by Donna Henes

You take your life in your own hands, and what happens? A terrible thing: no one to blame. – Erica Jong   The story of our lives is ours to create. We can design our own roles and ideals, compose […]

Self-Care

posted by Donna Henes

Recently one of my Midlife Midwife™ Counseling clients called me in hysterics from the supermarket. This was her first shopping excursion since her last child left home. She had been long divorced and now her nest was completely empty. As […]

Step Up & Take Charge

posted by Donna Henes

You take your life in your own hands, and what happens? A terrible thing: no one to blame. – Erica Jong The story of our lives is ours to create. We can design our own roles and ideals, compose the […]

Let Your Power Out!

posted by Donna Henes

    Many of you have, I am sure, come across this fabulous writing many times. It speaks to the heart of the matter of women’s dysfunctional relationship to our own power. In my spiritual counseling as a Midlife Midwife™ […]

Answer Only to Your Self

posted by Donna Henes

I Don’t Really Care What You Think Today, we see many women in public life, ranging the gamut from Hillary Clinton to Sharon Osborne, who have stepped out of the shadows of their husbands and families to pursue their own […]

Auntie Gravity – Part 2

posted by Donna Henes

 Auntie Gravity – Part 2 An Antic Cronish Goddess by Barbara Ardinger, Ph.D. “An’ you jus’ start thinkin’ of them lines,” She says, “as your Auntie Gravity’s rainbows, an’ remember all the colors of what you done in your life. […]

Auntie Gravity – Part 1

posted by Donna Henes

  Auntie Gravity – Part 1 An Antic Cronish Goddess by Barbara Ardinger, Ph.D.  Here is a goddess for mid-life. Sisters, do certain parts of your anatomy that used to stand right up and salute, now ignore the flag no […]

Go Light-Footed Through Life

posted by Donna Henes

Go Light-Footed Through Life by Sister Joan Chittister There is a deer in me—made for running, for scampering while the rest of the world around me walks. I am made to find and drink from foreign streams. I am meant […]

Her Green Pulse

posted by Donna Henes

In honor of the Verna; Equinox, I would .like to offer this beautiful poem: Her Green Pulse by Jo Carson The opening poem from “Dancing With Gaia” Blood of Her veins, the rivers Voice of Her breath, the wind Fire […]

‘Midlife Crisis’ Can Become ‘Midlife Opportunity’

posted by Donna Henes

 ‘Midlife Crisis’ Can Become ‘Midlife Opportunity’ By Maggie Lamond Simone      “What do you want to do with your life?” It’s a question I ask my college students this time of year to help them define their goals, and I’m […]

Myths About Aging You Need to Forget – Part 2

posted by Donna Henes

Myths About Aging You Need to Forget – Part 2 by Aleta Pippin Myth #3 You Will Become Crabby and Self-absorbed Some people are just plain rude and as they get older, they use their age as an excuse to […]

What Are Your Thoughts About Aging?

posted by Donna Henes

The process of maturing is an art to be learned, an effort to be sustained. By the age of fifty you have made yourself what you are, and if it is good, it is better than your youth. ~Marya Mannes […]

A Hymn To Venus

posted by Donna Henes

A lovely post Valentine’s Day poem: A Hymn To Venus By Sappho   O Venus, beauty of the skies, To whom a thousand temples rise, Gaily false in gentle smiles, Full of love-perplexing wiles; O goddess, from my heart remove […]

Peace Pilgrim – Part 2

posted by Donna Henes

Her long walk led to a period of concentrated inner questioning about what she, one person, could do in the cause of peace. This midlife meditation culminated in her experiencing a powerful spiritual vision, an undeniable epiphany. She came to […]

Peace Pilgrim – Part 1

posted by Donna Henes

I have found my favorite model of the Queen in the life of a remarkable woman known as Peace Pilgrim who devoted almost thirty years of her life to walking and talking for peace. Born Mildred Lisette Norman in 1908 […]

Say Something!

posted by Donna Henes

It is so damn easy to feel depressed, frustrated and disillusioned right now. In light of the widespread oppression, manipulation, intimidation that surrounds us today, we need to say something. There are signs everywhere in the subways of New York […]

Some Declarations of Queendom

posted by Donna Henes

  I have taken this ongoing discussion about the definitions and descriptions of Queendom to The Queen of My Self Page on Facebook.   Q. What does being a Queen mean to you ? A. As a little girl I […]

The Steep Path to Sovereignty

posted by Donna Henes

Coming from the tough love school of spiritual counseling as I do, I feel that it is only fair to warn you — There are no 10 Easy Steps to Sovereignty. The roads leading to Queendom are diverse and many. […]

The Midlife Queen

posted by Donna Henes

Who are we supposed to be at this stage of our life when we are less likely to be bound and identified by our kinship connection to someone else — as a daughter, a wife, a mother, a lover? What […]

Have You Seen The Queen’s Chronicles?

posted by Donna Henes

  I am about to publish the 53rd issue of The Queen’s Chronicles, the monthly Ezine that offers upbeat, practical and ceremonial inspiration for all women who want to enjoy the fruits of an influential, passionate and powerful maturity. Each […]

Celebrate the Autumn Queen

posted by Donna Henes

The Autumn Queen, who is past Her reproductive years, has never been differentiated in legend from the old Winter Crone, although they are clearly not the same. The Queen, though not yet old, is quite aware that the passing of […]

Every Woman Is The Queen of Her Own Heart

posted by Donna Henes

Every Woman Is The Queen of Her Own Heart By Shiloh Sophia McCloud Every woman is the Queen of her own heart. She must decide how to govern her own domain. She seeks friends and allies that honor who she […]

Red-Robed Priestess

posted by Donna Henes

Another book that I cannot praise enough is Red-Robed Priestess  by Elizabeth Cunningham, author of the preceding three books in the acclaimed Maeve Chronicles. After a life of passion and adventure that has brought her through slavery to the Resurrection […]

On Valentines and Vulvas

posted by Donna Henes

  From the beginning, women were exalted as the image, the echo, the counterpart companion of the Goddess. Their access to ecstasy, imbued with spiritual significance. As priestesses, they tended the fires and fanned the generative flames from Her sex, […]

The Garlic Lady in February

posted by Donna Henes

I have grown to love winter. It is a time of being home and laying low. A time of making soup and catching up on my ironing. A time of long, indulgent hot baths and slow starting mornings in bed […]

Our Lady of the Growing Light

posted by Donna Henes

February 2 marks the exact halfway point of winter. Along with the two equinoxes, two solstices and the three other seasonal midpoints, it is one of the eight energy-filled sacred days in the pagan calendar. Purification is the recurrent mythic […]

Have A Love Affair With Your Self

posted by Donna Henes

January is Self-love month. And if it weren’t, I, Queen Mama Donna, would declare it so! So for the rest of the month I will focus on the ways that we can show love and support to ourselves. There is […]

Self Love Quotes

posted by Donna Henes

January is Self-love month. And if it weren’t, I, Queen Mama Donna, would declare it so! So for the rest of the month I will focus on the ways that we can show love and support to ourselves. There is […]

Meditation for the Fully Realized Woman

posted by Donna Henes

  Blessings, one and all, for a New Year filled with promise. May you continue along your path to Self-sovereignty with purpose, passion, and power. With Queenly aplomb.   May you live as a Fully Realized Woman. With blessings of […]

Into the Darkness

posted by Donna Henes

Into the Darkness By Max Dashu, CA I love December. It’s a powerful time to absorb knowledge, write, create art, chant, dance. To conjoin and celebrate, feast and rejoice in community or – my great pleasure at this season – […]

Unfinished

posted by Donna Henes

Mid Life Crisis: What is it? Is it inevitable? Is it even a real phenomenon? Or is it an invention of the media — that is, corporate advertising trying to sell us things we don’t need? (Not only do we […]

Female Midlife Crisis or Midlife Alarm Call? – Part 2

posted by Donna Henes

  Mid Life Crisis: What is it? Is it inevitable? Is it even a real phenomenon? Or is it an invention of the media — that is, corporate advertising trying to sell us things we don’t need? (Not only do […]

Emerging Maturity – Part 1

posted by Donna Henes

  Mid Life Crisis: What is it? Is it inevitable? Is it even a real phenomenon? Or is it an invention of the media — that is, corporate advertising trying to sell us things we don’t need? (Not only do […]

MidLife Crisis: Life Renewed

posted by Donna Henes

  I have been inundated lately by articles about the so-called “Midlife Crisis.” Clearly it is subject very much on the minds of many, many women.  Mid Life Crisis: What is it? Is it inevitable? Is it even a real […]

A New Life – Part 2

posted by Donna Henes

  I see “Begin Again” as an ideal theme for this season. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions are […]

A New Life – Part 1

posted by Donna Henes

‘ I see “Begin Again” as an ideal theme for this season. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions are […]

To Be Present to the Present

posted by Donna Henes

  I see “Begin Again” as an ideal theme for this season. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions are […]

Mommy Has Dreams, Too – Part 1

posted by Donna Henes

  I see “Begin Again” as an ideal theme for this season. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions are […]

When Everything You Think You Know Changes

posted by Donna Henes

  I see “Begin Again” as an ideal theme for this season. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions are […]

Letting Go – Part 2

posted by Donna Henes

  I see “Begin Again” as an ideal theme for this season. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions are […]

Wear the Ring of the New!

posted by Donna Henes

  I see “Begin Again” as an ideal theme for this season. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions are […]

A Birthday Declaration of Independence – Part 2

posted by Donna Henes

I see “Begin Again” as an ideal theme for this season. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions are on […]

Happiness — A Work in Progress

posted by Donna Henes

  I see “Begin Again” as an ideal theme for this season. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions are […]

Get a Life

posted by Donna Henes

    I see “Begin Again” as an ideal theme for this season. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions […]

You Think You Are Not Enough

posted by Donna Henes

I see “Begin Again” as an ideal theme for this season. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions are on […]

If I Had My Life to Live Over

posted by Donna Henes

  I see “Begin Again” as an ideal theme for this season. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions are […]

Today is the Day

posted by Donna Henes

  I see “Begin Again” as an ideal theme for this season. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions are […]

posted by Donna Henes

  I see “Begin Again” as an ideal theme for the next while. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions […]

What I Know For Sure – Part 1

posted by Donna Henes

  I see “Begin Again” as an ideal theme for the next while. We have the supreme opportunity now in the autumn of our midlife to begin again. How shall we reinvent our Selves? What new programs, projects and passions […]

Have a Love Affair with Your Self

posted by Donna Henes

  It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content — or steam, whichever comes […]

posted by Donna Henes

  It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content — or steam, whichever comes […]

Anoint Your Self for Pleasure

posted by Donna Henes

  It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content — or steam, whichever comes […]

Sex, Sensuality, and the Midlife Single Woman

posted by Donna Henes

  Congratulations, Queens! This column has reached the milestone of 300 entries. To celebrate, I am giving away an autographed copy of The Queen of My Self: Stepping into Sovereignty in Midlife. to the first three readers who request one […]

Homage to My Hips

posted by Donna Henes

  It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content — or steam, whichever comes […]

Queen of Camp – Part 2

posted by Donna Henes

  It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content — or steam, whichever comes […]

Queen of Camp – Part 1

posted by Donna Henes

  It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content — or steam, whichever comes […]

Sexy Brain

posted by Donna Henes

  It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content — or steam, whichever comes […]

Peaches – Part 1

posted by Donna Henes

  It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content — or steam, whichever comes […]

posted by Donna Henes

  It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content — or steam, whichever comes […]

Desert Cougar Queen – Part 2

posted by Donna Henes

  It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content! I came across this article […]

Calendar Girls

posted by Donna Henes

  It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content!   In 1998 Angela Baker […]

A Hymn To Venus

posted by Donna Henes

  It is summer, hot and horny, and I am on a roll. So I am going to continue this theme of beauty, attraction, seduction, sex, love and self-love until I run out of content!   A Hymn To Venus […]

Previous Posts

To My Daughter, I Will Beg
by N'tima Preusser Military wife and new mother   One hundred and seven pounds. I worked hard for that weight. I was light. I was frail. I counted my corn kernels. My skin was colorless, punctuated with clogged pores, and my eyes ...

posted 6:00:50am Jul. 31, 2015 | read full post »

Successful Aging: Rituals to Increase Energy
By Helen Dennis, LA Daily News At some point, most of us acknowledge that we can’t do quite as much as we did years ago — and usually not in the same amount of time. If we overdo it, we often pay a huge fatigue price. Let’s focus on ...

posted 6:00:11am Jul. 29, 2015 | read full post »

Interview with a Canadian Queen – Part 2
QMD - When you imagined yourself as a woman in her middle years, how did you imagine your life to be? Is it? I am 62, so I am past my middle years. When I was a girl or even in college everyone thought I would never marry or have children. I ...

posted 6:00:53am Jul. 27, 2015 | read full post »

Interview with a Canadian Queen – Part 1
I recently attended a talk by Canadian author Catherine Gildiner and was quite taken with her good humored wisdom. When I read her book, After the Falls, I was hooked. She graciously allowed me to interview her and I would like to share her ...

posted 2:16:57pm Jul. 24, 2015 | read full post »

Am I Having A Mid-Life Crisis?
by Carolina Smart You ever have one of those Ah ha moments? Either one you came to on your own volition, or after a conversation with someone else; that someone being a good friend, family member or a stranger. I had one of those moments ...

posted 6:00:20am Jul. 22, 2015 | read full post »

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