The Queen of My Self

The Queen of My Self

Self Blessing

For some fifteen years now, the practice of Self Blessing has been the centerpiece of my personal spiritual practice as well as the many ceremonies and celebrations that I facilitate for others. When people are first introduced to the concept, they are often taken aback and suddenly shy. “Bless myself? Am I qualified? Isn’t that blasphemy?”

Surely we are each the most appropriate dispenser of our own blessings. Who but we ourselves really understand what we have been through, what we have gained and won, what we still need and desire, what we honor and aspire to? And who but we is dedicated to actualizing our own dreams? Learning how to bless our Selves, and doing so often and without embarrassment, is truly our crowning achievement.


Bless your Self every day in order to focus, facilitate, and enhance that mighty, internal energy-for-change which is your own best Self. The gift of Self Blessing is one that keeps on giving. The more you bless yourself, the more you will bless your Self. The more you value and validate your Self, the more compassionate toward your Self you will become.

The more worthy you feel, the more you trust your Self, listen to your Self, and discipline your Self. The more you bless your Self, the more you will count your blessings, and the more blessed you, yourself, become. Where blessing is concerned, more is definitely more.

There are two kinds of blessings: those that acknowledge and celebrate your growth and accomplishments, and those that proffer offerings of encouragement for that which you still hope to do.


Bless your Self as worthy. Congratulate your Self. Hug your Self close. Pat your Self on the back with pride. Pinch your own cheek with delight. Bow down and kiss your feet!

Bless your Self with words. It is important to articulate your blessing. Try verbalizing your thoughts out loud. Don’t worry about what to say or how to say it. Speak to your deepest Self spontaneously, from your heart. There can be no such thing as a bad blessing. It is a contradiction in terms. If your intention is positive, so will be your blessing.

The range of possibilities of ways to bless your Self is as boundless as your imagination. Be specific, creative and outrageous.

You can bless your Self with special oil. Anoint the crown of your head with the intention to concentrate on your intention.


You can bless your Self every time you apply your lipstick. “I bless my Self. I bless what I put into my mouth and I bless what comes out of my mouth.”

You can bless your Self with a scarf or a muffler. “I bless my Self. I wrap my Self with protection and surround my Self with love.”

You can bless your Self with a sheet or blanket when you get into bed each night. “I bless my Self. I cover my Self with confidence, with affection, with appreciation, with support.”

You can bless your Self with soap in the shower every morning. “I bless my Self. I cleanse my Self of impurities, insecurities and all negative thinking.”

You can bless your Self with unguents and lotions, applying them with loving affection. I bless my Self. I soothe and caress and embrace my Self and ease away all my troubles.”


You can bless your Self each time you sneeze. “I bless my Self. Goddess bless me!”

The more you bless your Self, the more you believe it.
The more you believe it, the more you project it.
The more you project it, the more you attract it.

Donna Henes is the author of The Queen of My Self: Stepping into Sovereignty in Midlife. She offers counseling and upbeat, practical and ceremonial guidance for individual women and groups who want to enjoy the fruits of an enriching, influential, purposeful, passionate, and powerful maturity. Consult the MIDLIFE MIDWIFE™

The Queen welcomes questions concerning all issues of interest to women in their mature years. Send your inquiries to


Previous Posts

What Menopause Taught Me – Part 1
By Darcey Steinke Hot flashes are inner apocalypses, singeing the body and the brain. During my first volcanic night sweat, a chaotic force moved through me. Heat rose, busting through the top of the thermometer, and swept through my body ...

posted 6:00:10am Oct. 09, 2015 | read full post »

What Does Power Mean to You?
I turned the topic of power over to the FaceBook Queen of My Self page: Q. What does power mean to you? What does it mean to have power? To be empowered? To wield power? To be a powerful Queen? Are you powerful? What does that mean to ...

posted 6:00:04am Oct. 07, 2015 | read full post »

I am mad. So very mad. No, that doesn't begin to describe it. I am pissed. I am angry. I am irate. I am incensed.I am outraged. I am enraged. I am livid. I am GODDESS DAMN FURIOUS. "All men are created equal," states the Declaration of ...

posted 6:00:55am Oct. 05, 2015 | read full post »

Eating Right During Menopause
By Kathy R. Byrnes This is a time when women need to realize that their bodies are changing and that eating well and being physically active may make the midlife transition easier My, how quickly the years go by! Menopause seemed like it ...

posted 6:00:49am Oct. 02, 2015 | read full post »

Aging Gratefully
What if "aging gracefully" isn't your style?. (And how to discover what is.) By Wendi Knox Don't get me wrong. "Aging gracefully" is lovely. In a quiet, refined, elegant kind of way. Which is great, if that's "You." But it's ...

posted 6:00:55am Sep. 30, 2015 | read full post »


Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.