The Queen of My Self

The Queen of My Self

A White Bath

January is Self-love month. And if it weren’t, I, Queen Mama Donna, would declare it so! So for the rest of the month I will focus on the ways that we can show love and support to ourselves.

There is only one person who is absolutely guaranteed to be with you loyally every day until you die. So you might as well live her! Will you join me in showering your Self with love starting right now?


Too hot to handle?

Here’s a wonderfully calming, cooling bath great for whenever you are hot and bothered. It is based on a suggestion offered to me by my friend and colleague, Dr. Rona Allen Mossman, for a time when my poor body was steam-heated from within by a seething undercover anger. This adaptation is equally refreshing for the hot flash power surges of midlife or the in/tense heat stress of a city summer.


To be taken three nights in a row, ideally by the light of a full moon.

Add to your bath water a bouquet of white flowers — lilies, tulips, daisies, roses; whatever appeals to you. Add enough white sugar to sweeten. And perfume or scented oils (might I suggest rose, ylang ylang, or vanilla?) Steep to the strains of cool jazz, Zen flutes, or whatever else soothes your soul.


Emerge feeling — and smelling — like dessert!


Donna Henes is the author of The Queen of My Self: Stepping into Sovereignty in Midlife. She is the Midlife Midwife™ offering counseling and upbeat, practical and ceremonial guidance for individual women and groups who want to enjoy the fruits of an enriching, influential, purposeful, passionate, and powerful maturity. Consult the MIDLIFE MIDWIFE™

The Queen welcomes questions concerning all issues of interest to women in their mature years. Send your inquiries to



  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment

    Dear Queen Mama Donna,

    After so much time passed, I am truly gratified that the White Bath is still healing you and others.
    I see your success and your generosity continuing because it comes from a loving and wonderful place.

    Much Love,
    Dr. Rona Allen

    • Donna Henes

      It was a great prescription, dear Rona. And the gift keeps giving! Thank you again for all your excellent advice.

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