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1. Thou shalt honor and believe in thyself.
2. Thou shalt move thy booty. Move it and move it some more.
3. Thou shalt never go hungry again. Eat small meals and healthy snacks throughout the day.
4. Thou shalt stock the fridge with the right stuff – the fruits and vegetables of the earth, the melba toast of men who walked before us.
5. Thou shalt honestly write it down. If you bite it, you must write it.
6. Thou shalt weigh and measure thyself and thy food.
7. Thou shalt drink enough Holy Water to frighten Noah and map out all the restrooms in thy village.
8. Thou shalt not deny thyself a treat or two now and then.
9. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s plate.
10. Thou shalt not eat out of misery, boredom, anxiety … but should they over-indulge, forgive thyself immediately. All Is Forgiven, Move On!
Our Lady of Weight Loss’s Ten Commandments of Permanent Fat Removal was featured on Good Morning America, ABC-TV and is one of OLofWL’s most popular creations!