O Me of Little Faith

It occurred to me last night, with the much-hyped premiere of another season of “American Idol,” that I still have never watched a full episode of it. I’ve seen a couple of clips, of course, and I caught part of an episode last year when that white-guy-with-dreads was singing. But that’s it. I fancy myself somewhat knowledgeable about pop culture, but I have not ever watched the biggest television show in pop culture.

And you know what? I’m not about to remedy that. I feel a perverse pride in never having watched “American Idol.” Why give in to my ignorance and break what is, at this point, a pretty impressive streak (even if I do say so myself)?

Besides that, there are some other things I have never done. They might surprise you. So I’ll list them:

1. I have never watched an episode of “American Idol.”

(Yes, I mentioned that already. But I thought it should appear in the list anyway.)

2. I have never seen It’s a Wonderful Life, with Jimmy Stewart.

3. Speaking of classic Christmas movies, I’ve never seen Miracle on 34th Street, A Christmas Story, or Christmas Vacation either.

4. I have never been to a sushi bar. I like almost all kinds of seafood, but have never really developed a taste for sushi.

5. I have never watched an episode of “Big Brother” or “The Hills” or “The Sopranos,” to pick three unrelated but popular television shows.

6. I have never been scuba diving.

(But I love water and have snorkeled numerous times).

7. I have never broken a bone.

8. I have never traveled outside the western hemisphere.

9. I have never been hunting, even though I live in West Texas.

(OK. That’s a lie. I went hunting for wild turkey with my dad once when I was 12. In about six hours of walking, we saw two. I shot at one. Missed, and was glad. Have never been hunting since.)

10. I have never been snowboarding.

11. I have never been to Boston in the fall.

(That’s a Christian pop-culture shoutout. Can you identify it?)

12. I have never lusted after an iPhone or used my cell phone to browse anything online.

(Distance is good. I don’t want to carry my computer around with me.)

13. I have never owned an album by Metallica, Guns ‘n Roses, Michael Jackson, or any hip-hop artist recorded later than 1993.


That’s my list. At least part of it.

What have you never done?

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