Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Lessons from a Recovering Doormat


How Do I Love Me? More Suggestions from Pros 2014 part 3

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Today is Day 26 of my 31 Days of Self-Love posts to celebrate Self-Love Month with suggestions for jump-starting your own self-love and joining The Self-Love Movement™.

* SL book_coverI recently asked some experts how they show themselves love and included some in2 previous posts, to give you more ideas that you can use for yourself. Now I’ve got some more suggestions! I’m delighted to have some wonderful ones to share with you. By pampering your mind, body and spirit, you can build strong self-love, which is a magnet for loving things and people into your world. Here’s what they had to say:

In 2007, I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis and was given 6-12months till I’d be walking with a Cane! After about a year of pity party hell, I decided to LOVE MYSELF by taking care of my soul, spirit and my BODY. I decided to immerse myself in one thing that I do best and that’s Jump Roping for the Love of it and for how it makes me feel! For me, Jump Roping equals self love and appreciation for my limbs and what I can do with them! Lucie B

As a former co-caregiver for both of my aging parents (Mom had Parkinson’s disease and Leukemia while Dale had Alzheimer’s disease), I supported where and when I could. Balancing the new-found responsibilities with my own life and watching my parents decline was challenging and I knew that I needed some help myself. My answer was to write. Journaling my thoughts and frustrations – as a form of self-love – proved to be very therapeutic as it allowed me the opportunity to vent and share only what I felt comfortable with sharing. Rick Lauber, author of Caregiver’s Guide for Canadians

I exercise nonjudgment when I look at myself in the mirror and I smile at myself as I would smile at a stranger I have had the pleasure to meet. I take this opportunity to  compliment myself too, even if it’s simply noting my shining hair or my shade of lip color. Laura S. Scott, President, 180 Coaching

1. I meditate daily for 20 minutes in order to reduce stress and get in touch with my deepest feelings about what is happening in my life at the moment. One of the mantras I use during this meditation… I only desire that which is healthy for me. 
2. Using the insights that come from that meditation I am able to speak my deepest truth more effective and to set appropriate boundaries with demands on my time.
3. I am part of a small hiking group that is passionate about getting out on the land at sunrise every week, either Saturday or Sunday. I find that this activity feeds my soul and creates bonds of love with the members of my hiking group. Ed Preston, SpiritQuest Sedona

I buy luxury products for my skin. I have had guys I have dated over the years tell me I have the softest skin ever, it makes me feel like a million bucks. I belly dance.  I have developed such an appreciation for my body! I love the swaying of my hips, the warm vibe I get from the woman in my class, and the sense of accomplishment I get when I master a new move. I had always been intrigued by belly dance but I had no idea how feminine it makes me feel. And I take that appreciation home to my man, it’s a win-win situation, lol!  Cassandra James, life coach and author

I love myself with getting enough sleep, making healthy & delicious meals, regular massages, walking/yoga, and my favorite – spending time reading and drinking tea while looking at the nature in my backyard and daydreaming a bit. In a world so rushed and focused on productivity, it’s important to take a break and feed your soul. Also, I set out my clothes the night before, have my teacup ready with a tea bag, and keep up my house so that I feel as though I’m in a bed & breakfast instead of a pigsty (too many years living like that!). Adrienne Raimo, Registered Dietitian Nutritionist, L.D., Columbia University Certified Heath & Wellness Coach

When I’m feeling lost and like I need to connect with and celebrate me, I sing or dance. I have no interest in doing either one well, only with all of my heart! They both come from a place where I don’t think or try or worry, I only be and feel and let go. When I’m singing or dancing I connect with myself and somehow begin to feel colored in, until the me I love being is filled up. I wish I could explain with more clarity, but there it is! I know not everyone feels the same about singing and dancing, but I do believe that everyone should find something that makes them feel fully free to be and celebrate themselves!  Tsara Shelton, Autism Answers

I take a leisurely walk in the woods with my dog – it’s the connection with Gabi (my dog) and being one with nature that my heart expands and much like the Claritan commercial, I can see more clearly the world around me and gain clarity of my next step. Not to mention that by taking care of me, I replenish my ‘glass’ and refuels my reservoir so stay focused throughout
the day. Chris Alexandria, International Your Transformational Coach With Angelic Insight

I sing myself love songs.* When I first started, it felt silly. But I’ve always wanted someone to sing me a love song and last winter I finally asked myself: why are you waiting for someone else to do it when you could do it yourself? And so I gave myself a love song. I walked around with it
playing on repeat, whispering the words to myself. And after I got over my embarrassment, it felt utterly amazing. I write my younger self letters. I don’t do this as often anymore, but it’s how I started down the self-love road. At first, it felt too weird to tell myself “I love you,” so my therapist suggested that I tell my younger self, that I write letters to young Gigi. And so I began writing love letters to my younger self, forgiving her, praising her, and offering her unconditional love.   Gigi Griffis, a world-traveling entrepreneur and writer

It wasn’t until I began being honest about who I was, where I was in my life and what I wanted did the self-love begin to actually manifest.. It was no longer something I said, but what I knew about myself. There are times when I don’t FEEL lovable, but I’ve learned to differentiate my feelings from the truth. The glue that holds everything together is the dialogue I have with my spirit and my inner critic. It’s a daily walk, a daily talk and if at any time I feel the two are not agreeing, I either shut my inner critic up, or reprogram her! Angel Thomas, certified relationship coach and expert in encouragement

This year I took a massive act of self-love and went on a holiday by myself. I took the time out after a break-up to re-centre, and re-energise, but most importantly, do forgiveness work on my ex-partner, and most of all, myself. Whenever I need to add a bit of self-love into my life, I love to remove myself from my regular routine, usually in nature for some time out. Hayley Carr, a life-coach from Australia,

For most of my life I have talked about writing a book as I loved writing, but never had time because I was always caving into extra work, family, school and volunteer responsibilties. Finally in 2011, I decided that writing a book was something I had to do for myself, so I had to start
saying “no” to a lot of people.  Although people were hurt, after finding out that I needed time to devote to this book project, they were ok with it and encouraged me to continue on this journey. A few downers will always tell you that you are wasting your time, but I try to ignore them as I dedicate myself to creating something unique in this world. My first book will come out in
April 2014! JF Garrard

After loosing my 14 month old son TJ, I learned that self-love is the only way to heal. The kindest thing I did for myself was allow ALL of my feelings, especially the ugliest ones. In one of my dark phases, I remember walking past a German Shepherd on the street and thinking “I dare you to charge at me.” I figured that if he did, that would make it ok for my to kick the shit out of him. The sooner I forgave myself for these (and many more) ugly thoughts, the sooner they went away. Installing a punching bag in my basement, writing in my journal, taking baths, walking, screaming, crying, and going on dates to with myself also helped! Carole M. Amber, GiftoftheLadybug.com

Try some of these tips to say “I love Me!” The better you feel from showing yourself love, the stronger your self-love will become!

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Join The Self-Love Movement™! Take the 31 Days of Self-Love Commitment“I commit to do my best to do something loving for myself, however big or small, for the next 31 days. and get my book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways for free at http://howdoiloveme.com. Read my 2013 31 Days of Self-Love Posts HERE. Join the Self-Love Movement™! on Facebook.



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