Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Law of Attraction in Action: Assumptions

This is post 75 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to attract all that you need. I do it every day! Read the posts in this series to see how.

Wanna know how to get on my nerves? Finish my sentence because you assume you know what I’m going to say. Or do what you assumed that I wanted instead of waiting for my answer. I don’t like when people second guess me. Many people don’t like it either. Yet we often second-guess ourselves when our confidence isn’t what it should be or if we’re scared or feel undeserving.


You limit what you can have or do by assuming it won’t work out.

When I was a DoorMat, I turned my assumptions into roadblocks for getting things I wanted by assuming I couldn’t have them. I believed I knew my place when it came to dating. For example, there were certain men I assumed were out of my league so I didn’t even allow myself a chance to date one. My assumptions led me to attract only the guys I assumed were what I deserved. Looking back, I prevented the “better” guys from dating me by assuming I wasn’t good enough for them. It happens in all areas of life.

Assumptions become your reality when they dominate your beliefs since you attract what you think.


Making assumptions can become a habit you don’t even notice—an automatic response to situations that you lack of confidence in or that low self-esteem can trigger. You may assume that:

* You won’t get the job you’d love because of the number of applicants. Someone has to get it so why not you? Assuming you won’t happen keeps you from applying and sends a message that you know you won’t get it. The Universe will accommodate you in not getting it.

* Someone doesn’t like you because they’re cool when you see them. Assuming that makes you cooler to the person. But often the other person is shy or may think you’re the one who doesn’t like them. I’ve assumed that about someone and quickly caught myself. When I made an effort to be friendly, the person warmed up too.


* You can’t go the distance in some form of exercise. I’m a walk-a-holic and on many occasions invited a friend to join me on a very long walk. Usually they assume they can’t do it and try to get out of it. The ones I prod are surprised that they were able to make it without falling apart. And it makes them happy to know they did it!

* It’s not the right time to ask for a raise. The right time is when you feel you DESERVE one! Assuming your boss won’t think you’ve earned one or that they company can’t afford it attracts less money. And if you don’t ask, you sure won’t get more!

You won’t know what you’re capable of doing or getting unless you try. That’s why assumptions need to be kicked out from under you if you’re letting them limit what you get. I stayed in DoorMatville for many years, assuming if I left I’d have no friends or security. Now I know that I create my own security, and people like me more, and for the right reasons, because I’m my own person now instead of a cloying people pleaser.


While I’m not into astrology in general, Susan Miller at Astrology Zone‘s horoscopes have been very accurate for me. Once she said that a one week window would bring me so much sex appeal, no guy would be able to resist me. I thought it was funny, but, it made me want to see if it was true. I went to a talk and saw a gorgeous guy across the room. Normally I’d have assumed he was out of my league but this time I smiled at him and got one back. We ended up going out for food after. I did this 2 more times that week and met some great guys I’d ordinarily not tried for. It taught me a lot about assumptions.

When you put out an energy of expecting instead of assuming you won’t get something, you’re more likely to receive.


Alan Alda said, “Begin challenging your own assumptions. Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once and a while, or the light won’t come in.”

Illuminate your life by giving yourself space left by assumption roadblocks that you get rid of. Challenge your assumptions by going after what you want. The worst that can happen is you don’t get what you want. But not taking risks assures you won’t get it! Years ago someone I worked me heard me saying that I assumed someone else would get the better assignment for the work I did at the time. He stopped me and said I must remember that when you assume something, you put an ass in front of u and me.


Now I’m on the alert for my assumptions. Most of the time I catch myself from letting assumptions stop me. I want to attract all the good I can! So I don’t want to give the Universe assumptions to make real. If you catch yourself assuming that something won’t happen, ask yourself what you’re afraid of? Rejection? Not being able to do the job? Disappointment? Being judged unfairly? Work on resolving those issue to dissolve the assumptions.


ANYTHING can be achieved or received by putting your mind to it, literally and spiritually!

Watch out for your own assumptions and catch yourself before you allow them to stop you from trying something or sending the wrong message to the Universe. Remember, assumptions don’t stop you unless you embrace them! Instead, embrace a desire to do what you want and get excited about getting it. That’s a lot more rewarding.

See all the Law of Attraction in Action Series..

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  • AngieB

    Wow! I do that a lot and it really is an excuse not to try. If I assume it won't work, I don't have to make an effort and I won't fail. But I do fail, since I don't even try. I'm in a rut that I have to get out of. I'm a doormat who stays safe. Reading your blog is really waking me up. Thanks Daylle!

  • Becky

    I actually just finished reading a book on the law of attraction titled, "The Objective is Happiness" by Thomas Wakefield. Since reading it I have been on a quest to learn more and more about the topic. It really hit me when you pointed out that you wouldn't date guys who you thought were out of your league, because the same thing happened to me. I didn't realize that it was a "law of attraction" issue, but you are completely correct. I have been trying to change my whole thinking process, in hopes that it will lead to a brighter future. Thank you again for your great post. It really helped put things into perspective!

  • Daylle Deanna Schwartz

    Good luck leaving your rut Angie!Sounds like a good book Becky! Glad the post put some things into perspective. : )

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