Beliefnet
Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

To start 2009 off on a loving foot, I’m posting something I give my clients who struggle with loving themselves. You may not love yourself right now but you can learn to with a conscious effort. Loving yourself is the BEST New Year’s gift you can give!

Self-help books encourage loving yourself, like a catchphrase. But doing it is the tough part. It’s easy to say “You must love yourself,” but hard to figure out how to achieve that. It sounds so nice but can feel very elusive. Clients tell me, “but Daylle, I just don’t love myself.” Often they don’t understand what it means.

Loving yourself begins with consciously doing things for YOU that are loving. You don’t have to love yourself now to do it.

The more loving things you do for yourself, the more you get focused on being loving. The more you focus on being loving, the more fertile ground for love to grow. When I was a DoorMat, I had NO self-love. And I thought it was impossible to feel it. But as I began to treat myself more lovingly–being kinder about my inner messages, treating myself to more things I enjoyed, cutting myself slack on self-loathing or getting angry if I made a mistake, eating healthier, doing exercise, using nice skin care products, etc.–the more my head was able to wrap around loving ME. It took time and lots of conscious self-loving behavior. But I was able to eventually develop the strongest self-love possible.

I NEVER thought it could happen. If I could learn to love myself, so can you! Yes, I learned by being loving. It made me feel good, so I did more and more.

I suggest you copy the chart below that I give to my clients, and make copies for every week. Then make sure you fill it in every night or as you do things for you that show love. Keep it where you can see it as a reminder to be more loving.

HOW I GAVE MYSELF LOVE TODAY
___________________________________________

Saturday

___________________________________________

Sunday

___________________________________________

Monday

___________________________________________

Tuesday

___________________________________________

Wednesday

___________________________________________

Thursday

___________________________________________

Friday

___________________________________________

If you enjoyed my post, please leave a comment and/or click on the bookmark and write a short review at some of the sites, especially Stumbleupon and Digg. Thanks!

AddThis Social Bookmark Button var addthis_pub = ‘wryter';

Advertisement

Previous Posts
Join the Discussion
comments powered by Disqus