Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Let’s Be Happily Naked! Part Un

Three cheers for the TV show, How to Look Good Naked with Carson Kressley on the Lifetime Network! Carson is illustrating what I’ve been saying in my books for years—whe you change your self-perception, you can become more beautiful and improve your body image.


I joke that my body got MUCH better as I left DoorMatville—without losing a pound! ?

When I was a DoorMat I hated myself for not being perfectly thin. Since we often go to extremes, anything that wasn’t thin was fat. I was tall for my age when I was young, and that translated into feeling fat. When I look back on photos of me during those years, I’m amazed at how slender I was. But, it set a tone for me to always feel like I wasn’t good enough. No matter what other nice things there were about me, I never noticed, because I had cellulite blindness—my fat perception was all I saw in the mirror.

When you feel like you aren’t good enough, you can become a People Pleaser to make up for it like I did. That’s how DoorMats develop.


I believe that body image is the top catalyst—by far—for insecurity in women and it also makes men self-conscious too. So now there’s this new show—How to Look Good Naked On the first episode that aired on Friday night, Carson gave Layla, a woman who has always felt fat and tried many diets, a body perception makeover. It began with her assessment of herself. I cried along with her because I remember how awful I used to feel when I looked at mine.

Carson helped Layla to find proper fitting undergarments to make her body look better with clothes on and also better styles. He also showed her a video with 3 women walking in different styles and outfits. He asked Layla to assess which one weighed the most and which was the sexiest. She had definite picks but SURPRISE! The were all the same woman in different styles. He showed how what you wear and how you carry yourself makes a big difference in your appearance.


Feeling fat makes us try to cover up, wear big clothing in hopes that people won’t see the fat so much. But Carson showed it actually makes your body look worse! I remember the days of covering up, not caring what I wore, since I assumed nothing would look good on me. Layla learned how untrue that is!

By the end of the show, Layla was getting into the groove and feeling good about her body. All her new inner and outer garments helped to change her body image. She said she now felt attractive! The time came for the title of the show to pan out—looking good naked. Layla posed for a photo, sans clothes. The verdict? She looked lovely according to all the people who viewed her in all her naked glory. I agreed! Once Carson knocked all the distorted perceptions from her self-image, she was able to appreciate herself.


Perception. Your perception decides if your glass is half empty or half full; if you’re a failure or you just made a mistake; if you’re fat or just not thin. That’s why I advocate working more on being loving to yourself. The more YOU love YOU, the more you’ll be open to having a more positive perception of how your body looks. The DoorMat me labeled herself as fat and didn’t see her good qualities. It took me years and someone pulling me in front of a mirror to recognize that I have beautiful green eyes.

I greatly related to what Layla went through with Carson. I remember my awakening to see myself as the beautiful, sexy hot woman I know I am. I’m still far from size 6. But it no longer matter. I love me and my body now. I think that watching this show will help a lot of people. Good for you Lifetime and Carson Kressley!


I’m going to make this Let’s Be Happily Naked week on my blog. This post is part one. Stayed tuned for more later this week!

If you enjoyed my post, please leave a comment and/or click on the bookmark and write a short review at some of the sites, especially Stumbleupon and Digg. Thanks!

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  • Susan Hobbs

    I’m going to try to catch a rerun of this show and watch it on Friday. It’s so true that most of us feel uncomfortable, or even shame, about our bodies. Thanks for the reassurance!

  • Daylle Deanna Schwartz

    Thanks for letting me know you found my post helpful Susan! Definitely check out the show!

  • Danny Bonner

    I’m sending this link to my sister. She drives me crazy with her complaints about her body yet she looks fine. I look forward to reading more. It’s been enlightening so far. Thanks!

  • Daylle Deanna Schwartz

    I’m glad that you found my post helpful Danny!

  • Jessie Lyn

    Weight issues are so hard. I watched the show and agree with your take on it.

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