Advertisement

Jesus Needs New PR

Jesus Needs New PR

The Curse of the Sexual Innuendo once again STRIKES Oral Roberts…

It’s crazy to think that life and culture was once so innocent, so pure, so holy that a preacher named Oral could put this picture on the cover of his magazine with the headline “Get Under the ‘Spout’ Where the Glory Comes Out!” and not think one thing about it?

What was it like to engage faith in a world that was still un-Orally fixated?

And you know very well that that woman in the picture had been under the spout that Oral was referring to. You can see its GlOry written all over her Orally-graced face.

Advertisement

OH WAIT…

What year did this magazine cover release again?

HOLY CRAP…. THIS COVER IS FROM 2010? Are you kidding?

It can’t be. It has be from 1978… or 1962… or heck, 1989…

But no… this a 2010 cover of Miracles magazine…

Who edited this thing, a 90-year-old blind nun?!

But in all seriousness, where can I find this spout you speak of? I want some of what she’s having.

Oh, and just in case you think this woman is faking it cover is a fake, here’s your proof

Thank you Aaron for sending this to me.

Advertisement
Comments read comments(23)
post a comment
Jamie the Very Worst Missionary

posted September 29, 2010 at 4:40 pm


Do you *really* want some of what she’s having?

I do not. No thank you. Uh-uh. No Oral Roberts glory spout for me.



report abuse
 

    Matthew Paul Turner

    posted September 29, 2010 at 4:46 pm


    No. Not really. Just thought it was funny. The crazy thing is I really did assume it was an old cover… and wrote all of that first part of the post thinking that way… and then I looked…

    Wow.



    report abuse
     

ed cyzewski

posted September 29, 2010 at 4:45 pm


That’s some wiggly and curvaceous type-face for “miracles.” If that itself isn’t a sin…



report abuse
 

Brandon

posted September 29, 2010 at 4:45 pm


Ok, so it IS possible for people to be so wrapped up in their own Christian bubble to not see the double entendre in the sub header. But if that is the case, why are there air quotes around the word ‘spout?’



report abuse
 

    Matthew Paul Turner

    posted September 29, 2010 at 4:49 pm


    Because there’s no actual spout, of course.

    Which is sort of HILARIOUS.



    report abuse
     

Roscoe

posted September 29, 2010 at 5:04 pm


Spout, outpouring, release, whatever. Faith is messy. Get out the black light to reveal the truth…



report abuse
 

Dan

posted September 29, 2010 at 5:11 pm


Okay. You got me. Your blog is genius. I bow.

Oral. *snicker*



report abuse
 

Pingback: Tweets that mention The Curse of the Sexual Innuendo once again STRIKES Oral Roberts… | Jesus Needs New PR -- Topsy.com

RevJATB (KnowTea)

posted September 29, 2010 at 5:42 pm


Well, I like Oral as much as the next guy, but …



report abuse
 

Joe Crenshaw

posted September 29, 2010 at 6:15 pm


Oral Roberts? You sure that isn’t a Jimmy Swaggert title?



report abuse
 

Emily M.

posted September 29, 2010 at 8:50 pm


Hahaha.. I’ve heard that phrase before, sadly.



report abuse
 

Crystal

posted September 29, 2010 at 9:11 pm


I didn’t want to laugh. MPT, shame on you! lol…



report abuse
 

kb

posted September 29, 2010 at 9:46 pm


Hmmm… I wonder if these verses ever come into play… 2 Kings 2:23-25; 1 Sam 24:6,7; 1 Sam 26:11



report abuse
 

kb

posted September 29, 2010 at 9:59 pm


Or Eph 5:3,4. How could this be construed in any other way than filthiness, silly talk, crude joking? Could it in any way bring glory to Jesus? In ANY way?
Do you think Jesus WANTS your PR?



report abuse
 

    Sbux Josh

    posted September 29, 2010 at 10:27 pm


    1) Mr. Roberts is not God’s ‘anointed’

    2) What kind of bear is best?

    3) what kind of fundie is best? OH SHHIT HERE COME THe BEARS!!

    But seriously, why should MPT have to follow what Ephesians says?



    report abuse
     

      Roscoe

      posted September 29, 2010 at 10:44 pm


      There goes the neighborhood…



      report abuse
       

Dianna

posted September 29, 2010 at 10:10 pm


Facepalm. Both at that cover, and the comments from KB.

But moreso at the cover.



report abuse
 

JenDOC

posted September 30, 2010 at 1:16 am


Well it is biblical. Ezekiel 23:20 – NIV There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.



report abuse
 

Spiritual Klutz

posted September 30, 2010 at 7:45 am


Oh my gosh, I really didn’t believe you until I checked it out. Somebody needs a damn editor.



report abuse
 

Noelle

posted September 30, 2010 at 10:41 am


Who names their kid Oral?



report abuse
 

James Brooks

posted October 3, 2010 at 12:47 pm


This is seriously unfortunate…



report abuse
 

Pingback: Christian Ignorance? « attempting transparent.

Post a Comment

By submitting these comments, I agree to the beliefnet.com terms of service, rules of conduct and privacy policy (the "agreements"). I understand and agree that any content I post is licensed to beliefnet.com and may be used by beliefnet.com in accordance with the agreements.



Previous Posts

Real quer Morata de volta
O Real Madrid vai acionar a cláusula de recompra no valor de 32 milhões de euros de Álvaro Morata junto a Juventus, que em junho de 2014 pagou 20 milhões de euros pelo atacante formado nas categorias de base do clube merengue, de acordo com ...

posted 5:46:00am Feb. 05, 2016 | read full post »

Jiangsu Suning confirma Alex Teixeira por 218 milhões
O Jiangsu Suning anunciou nesta sexta-feira a contratação do meia-atacante brasileiro Alex Teixeira por 50 milhões de euros (cerca de R$ 218 milhões), o valor mais alto de sempre pago por um clube da China.Alex Teixeira chega à equipe de ...

posted 5:32:00am Feb. 05, 2016 | read full post »

Falcao pode parar na China; Liverpool quase levou Icardi
O Chelsea ainda tenta negociar o atacante Radamel Falcao nessa temporada - apesar da janela ter fechado ontem.O jornal 'Telegraph' revela que o atacante colombiano esteve na Espanha , ontem, em uma tentativa de se reunir com o ex-clube, ...

posted 5:32:00pm Feb. 03, 2016 | read full post »

Janela europeia de encerra hoje. Veja as últimas noticias!
United se aproxima de jovem promessa do BenficaO Manchester United está em negociações avançadas com o Benfica para a contratação do meia-atacante Renato Sanches .Os Reds ainda estão para realizar sua primeira contratação na janela de ...

posted 7:54:00pm Jan. 31, 2016 | read full post »

United e Inter disputam contratação de Banega
A Inter de Milão pretende contratar o argentino Ever Banega, cujo contrato com o Sevilla termina em junho desse ano. O meio-campo ainda não renovou com a equipe espanhola, o que lhe dá a liberdade para assinar um pré-contrato com qualquer ...

posted 8:13:00am Jan. 27, 2016 | read full post »

Advertisement


Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.