Doing Life Together

Doing Life Together


Do Men and Women Speak the Same Language?

posted by Linda Mintle

talkingJack and Kirsten are out to dinner. Kirsten begins the conversation.

“How was your day?”

“Fine.”

That was it. Jack stopped talking. Kirsten was frustrated. Kirsten is thinking that a little more detail would be nice.

Let’s say Kirsten began the conversation, it might go more like this.

“I had a crazy day at the office. Joyce got mad at our boss and lost it. Everyone was upset, but afraid to say anything. It was a nightmare. What was your day like?” 

“Actually good.”

The men reading this are thinking, good grief, too much information!

But are Jack and Kirsten’s answers a function of the different social behaviors between men and women?

Studies have shown the differences in men and women’s brains to be more of a matter of degree, not of kind, meaning the two genders are more alike than different.

But a study at the University of Pennsylvania says that the different brain wiring in men and women may account for this difference. According to the researchers, gender differences in brain wiring begin to be seen in adolescence. Images of male brains show more connections WITHIN hemispheres. Women’s brains show more BETWEEN hemispheres. This means that women are more suited to multitasking and analytical thought; they express themselves using emotional states  and are more socialized towards emotions from an early age. Yes men, this might be why you find us overwhelming at times.

Men are better at linear tasks that require attending to one thing at a time. They too feel things deeply, but  don’t process things as quickly as women or put those feeling into words.

Furthermore, when an argument happens, women may stay upset longer. This is possibly due to the enhancing effects of estrogen that can prolong the secretion of the stress hormone. So when a man says, “Let it go, get over it. He already has!”

We know that sharing emotions does help relationships. So men, take a deep breath and think about what you might be feeling.

Ladies, don’t ask men “to talk” when they are watching football or fixing the sink. When you do “talk,” edit your speech and tell him what you need.

Men, pay attention to your physical body and verbalize what you are feeling. Share a few more thoughts than a one word answer.

In other words, let’s become more fluent in each other’s language.

 

Reference: Proceedings of National Academy of Sciences, Co-authors  Madhura Ingalhalikar, Alex Smith, Drew Parker, Theodore D. Satterthwaite, Mark A. Elliott, Kosha Ruparel, and Hakon Hakonarson of the Section of Biomedical Image Analysis and the Center for Biomedical Image Computing and Analytics.

 



Previous Posts

Fatal Attraction: What You Found Attractive May Now Bother You
When John dated Katie, he was attracted to how book smart she was and how much she loved to learn new things. He is the first to tell you, he's not cut out for academics and loves to play instead of learn. As someone who needed to play more, Katie was attracted to John's outgoing and fun personality

posted 6:00:02am Sep. 30, 2014 | read full post »

Would You Rather Be Shocked Than Bored?
I can remember so many times when my kids would say to me, "I'm bored!" And they didn't like my response, "That's a good thing. Maybe you can listen to your thoughts or think creatively." Truth is, most of us don't like to be bored. At least not in this wired age. Our typical boredom trainers are

posted 6:00:54am Sep. 29, 2014 | read full post »

Kardashian Catwalk Controversy: A Little Sibling Rivalry?
Think drama! NO, think mindless drama. Now who comes to mind? The Kardashians of course. If there is a way to keep their names in the news, they find it. And so it goes with the latest "controversy." Apparently, 18- year- old Kendall Jenner banned sister Kim Kardashian from attending her fashi

posted 7:55:46am Sep. 26, 2014 | read full post »

Lifestyle Changes Now May Prevent Alzheimer's Later
I remember when my grandmother began to have memory loss in her early 80s. It was hard to watch because she knew she was losing it. Eventually, Alzheimer's took its hold on her mind and she ended up in a nursing home not knowing who we were. If you, like me, have a family member who suffers with

posted 6:00:32am Sep. 24, 2014 | read full post »

What is Bipolar Depression?
When academy award winning actress, Catherine Zeta-Jones announced that she suffered from Bipolar II Disorder and checked into a mental health facility for a brief stay in 2011, it made celebrity news. People wondered. What is Bipolar Disorder and how does that differ from depression? The Nat

posted 6:00:15am Sep. 22, 2014 | read full post »




Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.