Doing Life Together

Doing Life Together


Learning to Let Go of Offense

posted by Linda Mintle

Do you ever have one of those days when you are mad at the way people behave? Something really unfair happens and you try very hard not to be offended?  Not that I am not perfect, but when I see people, especially Christians, purposely do the wrong thing because they are afraid to stand up for what is right, it bothers me. Today it is bothering me! I had two situations of offense to deal with today.  And in both of these situations, it was not safe to confront the people who doled out the injustice. This means, I can’t confront the problem and get it resolved. I have to live with the injustices and let them go.

Do you find that difficult? I do.

My first career choice was to be a lawyer and I think this is why- I have a strong sense of wanting justice, probably from experiencing things out of my control. And every so often, someone does something hurtful that impacts my future and I have a choice-let it go or hold on to anger and unforgiveness.

My head knows that I must forgive the person even though the person isn’t asking for forgiveness and probably doesn’t consider the ramifications of his actions. During these times, I engage my will.  I choose to forgive. My emotions take awhile to catch up. When this happens, I ask God to help me release the person to Him. Then I must trust that God uses these times of unfairness to build my character, and will bring good from these offenses. I also remind myself about the times I have offended God. Yet, He always forgives me and wipes the slate clean.

So today, once more, I turn the person over to you God. I don’t want to carry around angry feelings. I am not his judge or the Holy Spirit. You are. Yes, I was hurt by his actions but you know that, and will help my heart to heal. It is the relationship with You than makes it possible to release the offense and move on. My flesh wants revenge, but my spirit knows not to go there. On days like this, I am glad I have my faith and that God is patient with me.



  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment mary

    Very encouraging.Thank you for being helpful in forgiving when people hurt you.
    Your comment about being a lawyer because you like to see justice,well it doesn’t work that way.I’m sure you must know that.

  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment Jan

    just what I needed to read. someone was doing wrong to someone I cared about very much and I said what I felt. It didn’t help only made it worse. next time…thanks to this column I have what it takes to really help..just give it to GOD !!!

Previous Posts

Loving Your Body, Imperfections and All!
Is it so difficult to accept the bodies we’ve been given, to celebrate them as uniquely designed by God and created in His image? Apparently. Loving, even liking, your body is a rare thing in today’s culture. It seems we all belong to the sisterhood of the dissatisfied traveling pants! If we

posted 6:00:33am Oct. 16, 2014 | read full post »

What Type of Decision Maker are You?
Last week, I was going out of town for the weekend. I spent hours going over my wardrobe choices. What if it rains, gets cold, I want something more formal, etc.? My husband opened his suitcase, threw in a few outfits and was done with it. No looking back, waffling or hanging in the air with poss

posted 6:00:55am Oct. 14, 2014 | read full post »

5 Coaching Tips to Improve Adult Mother-Daughter Relations
Mandy was at the end of her rope with her mom when she called me for coaching. Every conversation ended with frustration. Why couldn’t the two of them get along better? Why did her mom constantly criticize her and tell her what to do? But Mandy’s biggest concern was how could she handle her mom

posted 6:00:18am Oct. 13, 2014 | read full post »

Why Our Wants May Not Turn Out to Be Our Likes
When our first dog died, we thought we wanted another. We did, but when we got the dog and our schedules all demanded more time, the dog became more of an imposition. Don’t get me wrong, we love her to pieces, but sometimes our happiness goes out the window when we are all trying to figure out how

posted 6:00:09am Oct. 09, 2014 | read full post »

Does Happiness Affect Your Success?
Happiness is a good thing, right? Yes and no. There is actually a down side to too much happiness. 1)   Happy people tend to be less persuasive. When happy, you can overlook details. Unhappy people can focus more on the details, create stronger arguments and thus do better with persuasion.

posted 6:00:24am Oct. 08, 2014 | read full post »




Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.