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Doing Life Together

Doing Life Together

June 2012 Archives

Christianity: More Than a List of Dos and Don’ts

posted by Linda Mintle

My teens regularly ask me why we have rules about all kinds of things. When I answer, I try to speak to the heart of the matter. Rules are like protective boundaries but obedience comes out of a heart of […]

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After Sandusky: What Survivors Face

posted by Linda Mintle

Jerry Sandusky was convicted of multiple counts of child abuse. But what about the victims who had to be so brave as to tell the story of their humiliation and victimization? Each one had to revisit the memory which could […]

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John Edwards and Reille Hunter Split Up: Why You Don’t Want to Read The Book

posted by Linda Mintle

John Edward’s girlfriend announced today on an interview with ABC’s George Stephanopoulis (Good Morning America) that she and Edwards split, they are no longer a couple. Interestingly, this announcement comes on the heels of her new book release. When George […]

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Why I Want to Be George Clooney’s Dog

posted by Linda Mintle

It’s the end of June and I am already tired of political ads (Can we really endure five more months of these?). We need a distraction. Hollywood never lets me down when it comes to something meaningless to read. So […]

Every Boy is Some Mother’s Son

posted by Linda Mintle

I love this story. I read it in the Wall Street Journal a few years ago. A reporter recalled a story that touched my heart. It went something like this. A mom was waiting for her daughter to return from […]

Jerry Sandusky: Should His Wife Be Clueless?

posted by Linda Mintle

With the Jerry Sandusky case in the news, I heard a well-known radio commentator ask, “If these accusations are true, how could his wife not know what he was doing?” It’ a good question that people may wonder. If someone […]

College is Coming: 8 Summer Talks to Have With Your Teen

posted by Linda Mintle

It’s the beginning of summer, the last one until that teen heads for college in the fall. How can you use this time to prepare your son or daughter for what is coming? Begin now to talk about anticipated changes. […]

5 Quick Ways to Improve Your Relationship

posted by Linda Mintle

I’m often asked to give a few tips on how to make your relationship better. Here are five quick tips: 1) Turn off media and engage with your partner. Looking at the person instead of a screen sends a message–you […]

Four Minutes, Four Times a Day to Improve Your Relationship

posted by Linda Mintle

I’ve been through years of relationship training. During those years, some ideas seem like good ones, others not so much. At a recent seminar I attended, I liked this idea and thought I would pass it on. The leader of […]

Married? Are You in the Majority?

posted by Linda Mintle

With a growing desire to say, Yes to the dress, Karla often dreams of her wedding day. In her head, it is all planned out–her colors, the music, location, the rings, the cake and how the ceremony will be conducted. […]

Father’s Day: How Dad is a Reflection of You

posted by Linda Mintle

I recently attended an all day seminar on couples counseling. We began the seminar filling out a form about our parents. There were two sections–positive and negative traits of  your mother and father (or major caretaker growing up). Then we […]

Caring For The Whole Person Adds to Quality of Life

posted by Linda Mintle

What if you went to your doctor’s appointment for your regular diabetes check up and did more than have your labs taken? Instead… A counselor talked to you about your support system at home and asked about other aspects of […]

A Not So Happy Father’s Day: 8 Ways to Cope

posted by Linda Mintle

As we approach Father’s Day this weekend, I am aware that not everyone looks forward to this day with anticipation. Sons and daughters who have been abused, neglected, abandoned and hurt by dad can have a tough time on this […]

Waiting For Your Inheiritance? 5 Areas to Consider

posted by Linda Mintle

Many baby boomers are counting on their parents to leave them an inheritance to pay off the mortgage, college bills or other finances. But with parents living longer, health care costs escalating and the market doing poorly, will the money […]

A Breath of Fresh Air

posted by Linda Mintle

I recently spent six days along the coast of San Diego, California hiking state parks, dining at cafes and shopping at boutiques and malls. What I noticed was that I didn’t have to move through a haze of cigarette smoke […]

Are You Normal When It Comes to Married Couples and Sex?

posted by Linda Mintle

Jennifer came to therapy because she was not having sex with her husband. She wondered if this was normal. It isn’t. Then she asked a question so many people ask, “What is normal when it comes to sex in marriage?” […]

Is Profanity on TV Harmless?

posted by Linda Mintle

Steven Tyler gets bleeped repeatedly on American Idol. Howard Stern, known for his use of profanity, is a judge on America’s Got Talent. I could make lists of people who are constantly bleeped on television due to their language. I […]

Try A Technology Cleanse

posted by Linda Mintle

You are at dinner in a nice restaurant with your wife and you find yourself checking your email before the salad arrives. Or your family sits down to eat and people are looking at screens rather than each other.Or maybe […]

10 Signs of Relationship Trouble

posted by Linda Mintle

Robert and Sarah had been together for five years. They had their share of fights, but one night, Sarah looked at Robert and said, “I’m done here. It is over!” Shocked, Robert knew things were a little rocky in the […]

Are You Too Happy?

posted by Linda Mintle

Happiness is a good thing, right? Sometimes, not so much! A Yale researcher compares too much happiness to too much food. When you overdo it, problems erupt! Too much happiness makes you a high risk taker. And with high risk […]

Previous Posts

8 Questions: Are You A Hard Worker or Workalholic?
In the same way a drug addict uses cocaine or an alcoholic downs booze, work can have an anesthetizing effect on negative emotions. People use work to escape and avoid unpleasant emotional states. But because hard work is so sanctioned in our society, it is an addiction often minimized. Our once

posted 6:00:40am Mar. 27, 2015 | read full post »

Breaking the Mental Habit of Worry
Because worry is in the mind, it is a mental habit that must be broken. Here are a few practical tips to help break the worry habit: Identify the thought behind the worried or anxious feeling. Let it come and don’t try to suppress it with thoughts like, “Stop worrying” “Don’t do this

posted 6:00:40am Mar. 25, 2015 | read full post »

Hurt By a Conflict? How Do You ReBuild Trust?
You've heard the saying, trust is easy to break, hard to repair. How do you go about building trust with someone you’ve hurt! The key is to know the other person’s world and reliably respond to it. Do what you say. Keep your promises. Empathize with the other person’s issue and try to see t

posted 6:00:39am Mar. 23, 2015 | read full post »

Should You Keep Secrets From Your Partner?
I was in the grocery store yesterday, and the tabloids were headlining the secret love child of yet another celebrity couple. Even though we tend to expect this sort of thing from celebrity relationships, secrets are a problem. They don’t usually end well. I am often asked if it is a good idea

posted 6:00:53am Mar. 20, 2015 | read full post »

What's Your Attachment Style in Conflict?
We all develop an insecure or secure bond with our original families. That bond is referred to as an attachment style. The more secure the bond, the better you will deal with conflict. Two bonding styles make conflict difficult--anxious and avoidant. To feel more secure you want to lower your an

posted 6:00:47am Mar. 18, 2015 | read full post »

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