This morning, I was perusing Facebook as is my habit, after posting pieces of writing and promo for classes that I teach, and I came across a meme that spoke to the grammar geek in me. I posted it and then my friend Courtney A. Walsh saw it and shared it. Immediately a slew of responses resulted. She then commented, tagging me, saying “See what you started?” I then volleyed back that I would rather have that kind of interaction when people read things that I have written. The tennis match continued as she encouraged “brevity and levity”, as well as detachment from what people thought about my writing. What occurred to me is that it is an occupational hazard for wordsmiths. We are given desire, passion, ideas and a Muse that often keeps us up at all hours and then we’re supposed to put our heart and soul out there for all to see and then not care who reads and embraces it? How unfair is that? I am able to occasionally surrender the hold that it has on me and just immerse in the magic of the words that swirl around. Although I love people and music, art, animals, dance and nature, it is words that entrance me more than anything I can think of. Seems it came with me from a previous incarnation since I was often seen toting a book around with me and even now, there is usually one in my briefcase, backpack or car, for company and inspiration.
So, this surrender thing…what I have found is that if I can enjoy the entire process, from calling in the ideas, to allowing them to enter my consciousness, to flow from my brain, down my arms, to my fingers which (although I don’t play the piano, I imagine it is sort of like that) lightly most of the time and intensely at others, tap on the well worn keyboard, to see the words appear on the screen, then I feel a sense of satisfaction. Do I want others to love it too? Of course I do, much like a proud parent wants anyone who gazes at their baby to oooh and ahhh over him or her as the most exquisite infant that has ever lived. There are times when I succumb to the ‘funny looking baby syndrome’ wondering if people think that my writing is ‘interesting’ or ‘nice’ if they aren’t any more moved than that. I want it to light a fire in them, inspire them, move them to action in their lives. I want it to tickle their fancy, spark self love, embolden their passion to do good in the world. I want them to melt when they take in what I have shared. I want to feel as if I have connected heart and soul with readers. Is that too much to ask?