According to the Chinese calendar, 2007 is (quite fittingly) the Year of the Pig. This Communist country is getting quite picky with who is allowed to adopt their babies. All persons taking antidepressants are out.

But don’t feel bad, fellow depressives, also ruled out are single folks, gay couples, high-school drop outs, people over 50 (unless you take a child with special needs–you get five extra years for that), humans with a BMI (body mass index) of over 40, and paupers with a net worth of less than eighty thousand dollars.

What’s next? Mortals with pimples on their left nostrils? Oh yeah, I forgot to mention those with severe facial deformities–you don’t get a kid, either. Try Russia.