Beliefnet
Because This Is Your Life

There are two things always going on in your life that each lead to one ultimate decision you make…

And it’s a decision that determines the path your life takes.

These two things are…thoughts about the past and thoughts about the future.

More specifically…

Thoughts about where you’ve been, what you’ve done, and the different people who were involved…

Along with thoughts of where you’ll be, what you’ll do, and the different people who will be involved in your life over time.

As for the one ultimate decision this leads to…

Well that has everything to do with what is going on now in the present moment…and this present moment can include this very second and/or the current time period in your life.

Because what’s going on in the present time for you is the very thing guiding you down the path to where your life is heading along with the events and people who become part of it.

There’s no escaping this…and it’s a good thing.

Yet…

It still leaves you with that ultimate decision you’ll make…even if at first you don’t feel like making it.

But once you make this decision you’ll know you made the right one…while looking back on it and being grateful and thankful you did.

And this all starts by realizing where you are right now in your life.

Which naturally leads to the question…

“Where are you in your life right now?”

1. New beginnings New endings- It’s been said that there are three guarantees in life…life, death, and taxes. There’s actually a fourth and it’s something always going on in your life in some way. This leads to a quote of mine…

“There’s always a new door opening in your life when an old one is closing. When you stop worrying about the closed doors, you’ll see more of the new ones opening up for you.”

The fourth guarantee…

With every new ending there’s a new beginning

…And this is going on in every area of your life, especially in the different relationships you have with people.

These relationships include your friendships and certainly the ones that are your closest and most intimate.

So what does this have to do with where you are in your life right now?

Interestingly….everything.

Wherever you are in your life currently is the result of what took place in the past in these different relationships. Now of course there’s likely to be events that took place that you’ll always remember and those you’ll certainly want to forget.

And strange as it may seem…

They’re all worth remembering because it’s actually the spring board to the next new beginning in your life.

For example…

Let’s say you were in a relationship with someone that didn’t work out to the point where you just had enough. Naturally you won’t want to get back in to another intimate relationship for a while.

At first it stands to reason…right? I can relate because it’s something I experienced after my marriage ended in 2006.

However…

This was an excellent time for new opportunities in my life, as it led me down the path to what I do today, along with the new relationships that came in to my life…some of which were much sooner than I thought they would at the time.

And the same is true in your life.

Any time you have a situation like this it’s nothing more than a new beginning that comes about because of a new ending.

Obviously I can’t tell you exactly what and how that will be in your life because your situation will have different details involved than mine or someone else’s.

But what I can tell you is…

When you treat these types of situations (even those that don’t involve relationships) as a new ending that gives birth to a new beginning you’ll be surprised at how things time out…even if it does have to do with getting in to a new relationship with someone that you thought at first you wouldn’t at that time.

So whatever the situation is for you, just remember that it has everything to do with where you are now in your life because that has everything to do with what took place in the past which now gives you the opportunity to determine your own future.

This brings us back to what I mentioned a few minutes ago…relationships.

2. A life of relationships- There is one thing that is certain about all humans…we’re all relational creatures. Meaning…it’s been “hard wired” into our DNA that we need to have relationships with others. Naturally this includes the different types of relationships, but especially intimate relationships too.

No matter how you look at it the entire human experience is a life of relationships.

And as you read earlier, the relationships you had in the past have led you to where you are now…but that doesn’t mean the result of those relationships will “carry-over” on to the next ones.

What this all means is that your past relationships has you where you are now in your life and they’re in essence guiding you to your new relationships.

This is a good thing even though at times it may not seem like it.

Now I’m sure you already know the feeling of not wanting to be in a relationship with someone. This can and does mean different things to different people…ranging from the mindset of, “I’m not interested in getting involved right now” all the way to, “I’ve had it with (men or women) and I don’t need anybody in my life.”

Even though that’s what you’ll hear people say on the outside the truth is…people who feel like this still want to be in a relationship with that one “special” person.

The reason why they say they don’t is because they’ve had too many past pains from their past relationships and they just don’t want to go through it anymore. Once you “dissolve” those past (feelings of) pain, you attract that special person in to your life.

So why is this important as it relates to where you are now in your life?

Because your most intimate relationships are the ones that guide you to realizing the truth about who you are. This is the purpose of relationships.

This also goes back to what I’ve spoken about before…the idea of being yourself when you’re around other people…and especially being yourself around other people (your friends and family) when you’re with the person you’re in a relationship with.

When you’re able to live according to the truth of who you are—no matter where you are in your life right now—you’ll set the stage for being able to go down the path you want in life. You’ll in a sense determine your own destiny.

And it all starts by just being YOU. And one of the best ways to start being you comes from your most intimate relationships with others.

Here’s something else that’s also interesting about this…

As important as relationships are it is equally important that you have “alone time.”

Most people think “being alone” is not healthy. It is when balanced with your most important relationships…even the intimate ones you have.

And I’m sure you can relate to this quite well.

How many times did you just want to “get away” from others and be by yourself?

Quite often…right? I know I do…we all do.

Naturally this is important because it gives you that time to “think” and as I like to say “feel” about what’s going on in your life. These are some of the best times to plan out your life and the path you want it to go down.

This is especially effective when you are in a relationships with someone. The most loving relationships you can ever be in with someone are those where the person you’re in a relationship with is “all for” you having “alone time” or “me time.”

When someone cares about you they won’t “blink an eye” or say a word about it. And this can also include having that “alone time” with your friends.

So no matter how you look at all of this, your life of relationships—especially your most intimate ones—are there to bridge the gap from where you were in the past to where you’re going in the future.

And since this is all taking place in the present time for you, obviously you can still do something about it.

3. The sunshine of your life- In every important decision you make in your life the same thing is always present…you’ll get equal amounts of pleasure and pain, support and challenge, praise and criticism, and so on. And over time they’ll be different sets of these.

Naturally, your situation will be different than someone else’s…but this is still true in every case. It’s a matter of looking to see what these are in the specific areas of your life.

Because when you do…and you see the “balance” of the different things going on in your life…not only are you less emotional, but you’ll also start to bring in to your life many of the things you’ve always wanted…to include those that at first you may have been trying to avoid.

An excellent example of this is what you read earlier about relationships.

So whether it’s relationships or any other area of your life…when you approach life this way (to include where you are in your life right now) it will bring the “sunshine of your life” in to your life by way of the new people you meet who become the special people in your life.

This is one of the driving forces responsible for taking you down the path of life you’d love to go…and it will include people who become (or are currently) your friends, along those who become the people that make up your most special relationships in your life.

And all of this emerges and grows in to you being seen as “special”…not in an entitled way, but in a way that brings out what makes you the unique person you are…in a way that serves the people around you and the world.

It bring out what makes you…YOU.

Remember…

There is always a point in your life that is the “Where are you in your life right now” point…

It’s commonly referred to as the present moment.

And no matter what that moment is it makes up a piece of your life. And when you see how this moment is just as important as any other moment…and how it is responsible for the path your life goes down…that’s when you appreciate it even more, along with the people who are part of it.

The bottom line is…

Make every moment count in your life.

Because you never know if you’ll get that chance again…and even if you do you don’t know how long it will last.

Appreciate yourself…appreciate the people in your life…appreciate where you are in your life right now…And make sure you let the people in your life know how much you do.

When you do…

People will appreciate you for the person you are…

A person who is “real” and brings value to the world by just being YOU!

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