Get clear on what you want

If you could wave your magic wand and create the ideal holiday season for you and your family, what would it entail? Would you do away with gifts altogether? Would you somehow get out of the annual gathering at your annoying cousin’s house? Take a look at what your capital-W wants for the season are—they are a great clue to what you value about the whole affair.

Getting in touch with your desires gives you something to aim for. If what you want is relaxation, you’ll be emboldened to turn down the numerous requests for school volunteers, or invitations to cookie exchanges. If you know you want to use the holidays as an opportunity to feel more connected to others, it will inspire you to invite your favorite people over for a gathering.

Knowing and moving toward what you want is not selfish. The Latin roots of the word “desire” means “of the Father.” As in, divine. Your deep desires benefit you and those around you in surprisingly meaningful ways.