A Prenuptial Agreement for Interfaith Couples

Prenuptial pacts between couples with individual financial holdings have become increasingly popular and effective. The following questionnaire for interfaith couples is suitable for insuring vital communication that can help stave off problems arising from an interfaith marriage. The resulting pact can also be adopted as a legal agreement.

The first step is to gather background information. This is going to be fun, because you are going to find out so much about each other. As you share memories, feelings, and hopes, you will also be taking a religious inventory of your lives that will help you to make crucial decisions about the future you will share. The process could take days, possibly weeks.

Did you have a ritual circumcision? A christening? Were you baptized? Did you attend Sunday school, Hebrew school, parochial school? Did you have a Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah ceremony? A First Communion? Confirmation? Did you have a "born again" experience? Would you want your children to have any of these experiences?

Which religious holidays are the most memorable for you? Reminisce about special moments on the Sabbath, at Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, Passover, Christmas, Easter.

Do you believe in God? What is your concept of God? Do you believe in Jesus? Do you feel that your religion has given you strength, identity, an ethical frame of reference with which to relate to the world? Have you had a special relationship with a rabbi, priest, minister, nun, or guru? How did this person influence your life?

How does religion fit into the lives of your parents? Young people so often struggle to break away from their parents' lifestyles that it is difficult for them to assimilate the idea that all of us emulate our parents to some degree. But the fact is, our parents are our first role models. Their habits, mannerisms, speech patterns, and attitudes are programmed in our heads. We can't tell you the number of times we have heard middle-aged persons comment about their spouses, "He turned into his father," or "I close my eyes and hear her mother."

Continued on page 2: »