A Jewish Wedding

This traditional Jewish ceremony was adapted for the union of two women, Kathy and Joyce.

What are we doing here today?

"Homosexual relationships are no less valid or worthy than heterosexual ones and therefore deserve no less. (But also), they are not exactly the same and do not need to do everything exactly the same." -Rabbi Janet Marder

What we are doing today is:
  • Ritually affirming a change in status in Kathy and Joyce's relationship
  • Giving of the blessing of Judaism, of family and community to Kathy and Joyce
  • Witnessing in public their commitment to share their lives together
  • Linking their relationship to the stream of the Jewish people and to our Jewish community
    >br> Since, in a civil context this act has no legal standing, the religious and communal meaning of what we affirm today is that much deeper and richer.

    A traditional Jewish wedding is divided into two parts-erusinor, betrothal, and nissuinor, carrying off. Betrothal provides the legal container into which a couple makes commitments to one another. Kathy and Joyce have written a ketubah, a contract, which they regard as legally binding. They will exchange rings, gifts given to one another as an expression of their intention to maintain their covenant with one another.


    In nissuin, we celebrate the emotions and love which fill the container. Your role in this celebration is to rejoice with Kathy and Joyce. Ritually, the way in which we do this is to say "amen" to the blessings under the huppa. At the party, I know that you have many creative ways to rejoice with them!

    B'rukhot ha-ba-ot b'shem Adonai.... Blessed are you who come here, under this huppa, in the name of God. 0 most awesome, glorious and blessed God, grant Your blessings to two who enter here with love and hope and joy. Make their home a shelter against the storm, a haven of peace, a stronghold of faith and love.

    This cup of wine, is symbolic of the cup of life. As you share the one cup of wine, you undertake to share all that the future may bring. All the sweetness life's cup may hold for you should be the sweeter because you drink it together; whatever drops of bitterness it may contain should be less bitter because you share them. As we recite the blessing over wine, we pray that God will bestow fullness of joy upon you.

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