Happy Holidays and the War on Christmas

Andrew Bowen, Project Conversion

God bless another wonderful opportunity to split hairs and divide one another. These greetings mean essentially the same thing from the Christian vantange point as "merry" and "happy" are virtual synonyms. The word "holidays" comes from "holy days", perhaps referencing the Advent season building up to Christmas. So Christians can settle down on that point.

On another front, we must recognize the pluralistic nature and reality of our country. More than one holiday is celebrated in December. Instead of arguing over an either-or decision, why not make a specific reference depending on whom you're speaking with? Maybe that's too tough. Therefore, "happy holidays" covers all in one and shouldn't come across as difficult or insulting. Meanwhile, children are starving and homeless this season and probably don't care which greeting you use. How about we argue over how to end their suffering?

Andrew has participated in 12 religions over the last 12 months, read about his adventures here!

Hesham A. Hassaballa, Common Word Common Lord

In the Name of God, the Compassionate, the Merciful

During these days, many of my patients, as they are leaving, tell me: “Er…Happy Holidays!” I know they mean well: they don’t want to offend me by saying “Merry Christmas.” But, I’m here to tell you: I would not be offended if you say to me: “Merry Christmas.”

I mean, that is a very nice thing to wish me: happiness on Christmas Day. No, I don’t celebrate Christmas…but that doesn’t mean that you can’t wish me happiness on Christmas Day. I would welcome such a wish, because, Christmas Day for me is so boring.

Nothing is open…nothing! A couple of years ago, I had to work on Christmas night, and I was looking for something to eat: nothing but the Muslim-owned Mediterranean restaurant was open. But, I didn’t want that food: I wanted Chinese food. But, all the Chinese restaurants were closed! I was totally devastated.

If the wishes of my patients for a “Merry Christmas” came true for me, I would find all restaurants open for business on Christmas night only for me, and if I go to any of them, they will give me food for free in gratitude for coming in on Christmas night. So, please, wish me a Merry Christmas, for God’s sake!I see no problem for me as a Muslim wishing my Christian friends and neighbors “Merry Christmas” during Christmas season. The same goes for my Jewish friends and neighbors during Rosh Hashana. Once I told a patient, whom I knew to be Jewish, “Happy New Year.” She was quite surprised, and she said, “Happy New Year to you, too?” (Asking if I was Jewish). I said, “No, but I know it’s Rosh Hashana.” I knew she appreciated it, and that made me very happy.

We should do more of this sort of thing. If we each wish our neighbors a “Merry Christmas” during the Christmas season; a “Happy New Year” during Rosh Hashana; a “Happy Kwanzaa” during Kwanzaa; a “Happy Divali” during Divali; the bonds of our brotherhood and sisterhood will be all the stronger. The barriers of hate and fear will be destroyed. And our country will all the better for it.

So, to one and all, I say to you: Have a very Merry Christmas and a prosperous, Happy New Year.

Hesham is a frequent Beliefnet contributor and author, including his great Beliefnet blog.

Nell Minow, Movie Mom

It seems far more in line with the true meaning of Christmas to focus on compassion, understanding, and generosity than to worry about the vocabulary other people use to express their warm wishes for health and happiness. But my own preference is for "Happy Holidays." Those who do not celebrate Christmas can find this a very difficult time of year, with every grocery store checkout clerk and strangers on the street asking their children what they want Santa to bring them and every radio and television station consumed with Christmas programming. I would like to see those who are caught up in the joys of their own Christmas celebrations show more sensitivity and respect to those of other faiths. They may find that doing so will help them reconnect with their own sources of spiritual inspiration in the holidays; certainly it will help them represent the best of Christianity to others more meaningfully than an unthinking "Merry Christmas" would.

Check out Nell's Movie Mom, a great blog for movie reviews and features!

Sheetal Shah, Om Sweet Om

One of the core beliefs of Hinduism is pluralism - the idea that there is more than one path to the Divine. With that comes a sense of acceptance of varying beliefs. And I believe, it also allows Hindus to acclimate rather well into societies where they form a minority.

Throughout my childhood, my parents put up a Christmas tree in an effort to ensure that I didn't feel "left out." They understood the excitement and holiday spirit as well as a child's need to fit in with her peers. We woke up on Dec 25, and my parents would wish me a Merry Christmas as I raced downstairs to open my presents. At the same time, they very much kept our Hindu traditions alive, and we celebrated Diwali - the Festival of Lights - every year, just as we did Christmas. Eventually, they began transitioning the celebration - Diwali became even more festive in our household; they began giving me gifts me on Diwali instead of Christmas; and late in my teens they finally asked if I would be alright if we didn't put a Christmas tree that year.

And while my parents no longer put up a Christmas tree, and my husband I don't either, we still very much revel in the holiday spirit and enjoy walking past the tree at Rockefeller (despite the insane crowds). There is something very beautiful during this season - perhaps more due to everyone's festive mood than the actual celebration of something religious.

Strictly speaking, for Hindus, the last two-three weeks of December do not have a particular significance, so the debate over "merry christmas" or "happy holidays" is rather muted. While many important festivals and religious holidays are celebrated throughout the year, Diwali is one of the grandest and celebrated by Hindus worldwide. As Hindus follow a lunar calendar, the date of Diwali (and all of the festivals that lead up to it) changes each year, but it generally falls between late October and early November. Our New Year immediately follows Diwali. So, from a purely religious perspective, the end of December is not celebratory for Hindus.

I do find it heartening that as Americans we have become more aware and sensitive of the beliefs of those of us who are minorities. And in that light, I always wish my friends "Happy Holidays." At the same time, coming from a pluralistic tradition, I am not offended when someone wishes me Merry Christmas nor do I have any qualms about returning the wish.

Sheetal offers a unique Hindu American perspective at her blog Om, Sweet Om.

Britton Gildersleeve, A Beginner's Heart

I’ve never understood why wishing people ‘Happy Holidays’ is insulting. December isn’t only Christmas – it’s Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, and Ashura. It’s Bodhi Day and Solstice. It’s school break, and winter holidays, and spending time with friends & family. It really isn’t only about Christmas.

My friend Rama says that many Hindus believe all faiths are simply different ladders leading to the same place – God, if you believe in one (or many). That’s kind of what I think: all prayerful/ contemplative intention climbs a ladder of practice. Brings us closer to whatever it is that animates each of us. Buddhists would say Buddha nature, but I’m also happy w/ just thinking it’s the human breath that links each living system to the next.

So I don’t ask people what (or whom) they celebrate. I wish them Happy Holidays – hoping to include them in the happiness I feel at this time of year. Hoping they too are excited to see family return ‘home.’ That smells of special baking and cooking fill their kitchens.

Thus I’m puzzled by people who want to exclude most of the world from December festivities. Here in Tulsa, we now have two Holiday Parades. The newer one sprang up in reaction to making the older parade inclusive. Many Christians – including our US senator – refused to attend if it wasn’t called a ‘Christmas’ parade. Since Tulsa wanted to include non-Christians in the Parade of Lights (as it’s now called), we now have two parades.

Now, I certainly understand why people would want to celebrate their own religion. But I don’t understand why it’s offensive if I don’t want to celebrate in their way, in their tradition. I wouldn’t say ‘Happy Hanukkah’ to a Christian, as neither the Christian nor I are Jewish. So why would I say ‘Merry Christmas’ to my Muslim, Wiccan, Buddhist and non-Christian friends? I do say Merry Christmas, often, if I know what religion a friend is. But sometimes, since Happy Holidays is my default, inclusive greeting, I just forget.

So I don’t understand – again – why some Christians feel the need for a separate parade. Or why it’s hurtful if I try to include all my friends in my winter happiness. In addition to being Buddhist, I’m Unitarian. I don’t expect my non-Unitarian friends (and there are a lot more of them) to know the 7 principles of Unitarianism. Or that they would celebrate my Buddhism or Unitarianism. Why would they?

Perhaps because I grew up overseas, where faiths were like a braided ladder of many colours that led each of us to our beliefs, I want to honour the many faces of religious and spiritual belief. One of my favourite poets was Baha’i. Another was Muslim, a third Church of England, and others Buddhist, agnostic, Hindu, atheist and who knows what else…?

There have been times in my life when I have answered the question What religion are you? and/or What church do you go to? with the response ~ My religion is poetry. I’m only half kidding J. Maybe in this time of winter festival, I will go back to that. Maybe I’ll begin wishing people – Joyous Rhyming! Or Merry Metaphors! Okay – that’s it. I’m sooo going with Merry Metaphors!

Britton offers equally interesting posts at her blog, A Beginner's Heart

Malachi Kosanovich, On the Doorposts of My House

If I know someone, or can tell that they are a Christian I say Happy Christmas. If I don't know a person, I say Happy Holidays. I've long since given up on hoping that someone would say Happy Chanukah (even though it's fairly obvious I'm Jewish). That said, I think the whole debate is silly. Christians who want to keep Christ in Christmas could be spending time feeding people, working in shelters, actually practicing their faith instead of wasting so much time arguing over what to say at this time of year.

Malachi is our resident tattooed Jew and the writer of the provocative Jewish blog On the Doorposts of My House!

Aziz Poonawalla, City of Brass

My approach is to always return a "Merry Christmas" with a "Merry Christmas", and I always lead with "Merry Christmas" to someone I know is a practicing Christian. It's the same as someone wishing me (obviously Muslim, visually) Eid Mubarak - a nice gesture of respect. But for the general public or an unknown, I will use Happy Holidays, to be as inclusive as possible. I think that the spirit of the holiday season, which spans Christmas and New Year's, has transcended the religious and become not secular per se, but rather multidisciplinary, and speaks to humanistic values that all religions, atheists, and agnostics share. The divine aspect of Christmas is one facet of the gem, but we can choose any facet to look through, or appreciate it as a whole.

Anyone who chooses to be offended by how someone greets someone else during this season is someone who has missed the point.

Aziz writes the fantastic Muslim blog City of Brass