Secret Number Four: The more you focus on your mate’s past, the more likely they are to repeat it. Everyone comes to the marriage with a past. Much of that past was before you were around and had nothing to do with you. In other cases there are desperate things that happen in a marriage, especially in the early years, that become the past. If you are not willing to forgive and move forward, you keep your partner focused on their mistakes, obsessing over their failures and setting themselves up to do it again. No matter how hard they resist, if you don’t free them from a focus on the past they may stop protecting themselves and fall prey again, since you won’t let it go.
Till Death Do Us Part …»