Public Purgatory

A few weeks ago, a prominent Florida rabbi was caught propositioning an illicit sexual act from another adult male in a public place. The rabbi allegedly invited an undercover police officer into a bathroom stall at Sears, inferred that he was seeking a sexual liaison, and exposed himself to the officer. The incident was good for a cheap laugh, for self-proliferating email distribution, and for feeding the public's insatiable appetite for schadenfreude--taking delight in another's undoing.

Perhaps in this open and unrelenting society, comedy was in order. Winding up as a one-liner in a Leno monologue or a Letterman Top Ten list has become part of the ritual of public purgatory.

But let me give this pants-down scene a different perspective: Despite the rabbi's willful misdeed, this situation was a tragedy, not a Seinfeld sketch. A once-respected leader capitulated to misbegotten lust. Who knows the demons at work in his soul? Who knows the conflicts that tormented his conscience? All we do really know is that he is already suffering all the grief he deserved and then some. He is likely to have forfeited his job, his marriage, his esteem, his clerical authority, and his ability to walk down the street without facing murmured scorn or derision.

Perhaps he deserves all that. But, after society has meted out its punishments, who will be there to give a modicum of solace and encouragement to a hurting, isolated, failed man who gave in to impulses that bespeak tortured unwholeness, not criminality? Who will comfort him, show him some understanding, and restore his sense of self-worth?

Having mercy on a person who has suffered undeservedly is, sadly, a rare quality in our contentious, calloused society. Yet, anyone who has been there knows that everyone needs someone by his side, someone who may loathe the sin yet acknowledge the humanity of the sinner.

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