Parenting the Facebook Generation

"Three daughters?"

"Yes," I reply, with a cringe in my face.

"Wow! Just wait until they are teenagers," I am told.

"We will cross that bridge when we get there," I say, and I stop thinking about it, because I don’t want to think about it. I don't want to think about my daughters--my little, innocent babies-- growing up and becoming teenagers. Yet, that day is fast approaching. My sweet little girls are growing up, and I have to face that fact.

And it terrifies me to death.

So many times as I was growing up, my mother told me that I would never understand and appreciate her until I had my own children. And so many times I would roll my eyes and say, "Yes, I know, mom!" But she was absolutely right. And now when I throw my hands up in exasperation at the difficulty my wife and I have at times with our children, I think of my mother (and father) and say a prayer for them.

It was tough raising me and my other siblings the 80s and 90s. And that was when there was no internet--no YouTube, no Facebook, no MySpace, no texting or instant messaging, not even cell phones (well not as widespread as they are today). But I am a parent with children who are being raised with a mouse in their hand, and I am struggling with how to keep them safe and teach them right from wrong as I watch my children (quickly) grow up into tweens and teens.

Where do I draw the line? How intrusive should I be? How can I be there with them without literally being there with them? How can I be sure that the person they are texting is not an online predator? Should they have a computer in their room? What if they want to create a Facebook account because ALL their friends are on Facebook? How much should of their personal life should I allow them to post for the entire world to see (and I mean, the entire world, frequently and forever)?

If I am too intrusive, will I suffocate my children and force them to do exactly what I don't want them to do as a form of rebellion? Should I tell them, as I was told, that God will punish you if you do something wrong? But, I don't want them to have an image of a God that is vindictive and mean. What is a parent to do with this "high tech" generation?

Continued on page 2: One parent says when it comes to Facebook, total lockdown is the answer. »