Ten Days of Silence: Inside a Vipassana Retreat

Nandini Naik, 21, is a religious studies major at Colby College, Maine. Her spiritual quest has led her to Zen meditation, Reiki, and most recently, a 10-day Vipassana retreat in her native India. In a recent interview, she described what it was like to spend over a week in silent meditation and self-observation.

What was your childhood religious background?

I was raised as a Hindu, but my parents were very liberal and they never forced religion upon me.

What motivated you to do Vipassana?

When I heard of Vipassana, it appealed to me because I love talking and it seemed like a challenge to not talk for ten days. I also liked the fact that Vipassana does not stress a particular religion or sect - it envelops and accepts all.

I was also smoking and drinking more than I would have liked and thought that Vipassana would be a good detoxification - physically, emotionally and mentally.

How were you taught?

The main professor was Shri Goenkaji, who came to India from Burma in 1969 to reintroduce Vipassana to the land of its origin. We would have discourses for about an hour and a half on what practical work we had done during the day. And during the lectures, Guruji often added funny and meaningful stories. Besides Guruji, there were numerous assistant teachers.

What was an average day like?

Here's our timetable:

4 am Morning wakeup bell
4.30 - 6.30 am        Meditation in hall or residence
6.30 - 8.00 am     Breakfast Break
8.00 - 9.00 am     Group Meditation in hall
9.00 - 11.00 am     Meditate in hall or residence
11.00 - 12.00     Lunch
12.00 - 1.00 pm     Rest
1.00 - 2.30 pm     Meditation in hall or residence
2.30 - 3.30 pm     Group Meditation in hall
3.30 - 5.00 pm     Meditate in hall or residence as per instructions of the teacher
5.00 - 6.00 pm     Tea Break
6.00 - 7.00 pm     Group Meditation in hall
7.00 - 8.30 pm     Teacher's discourse in hall
8.30 - 9.00 pm     Group Meditation in hall
9.00 - 9.30 pm     Question time in hall
9.30 pm     Retire to own room. Lights out.

The food was pure vegetarian and one could have as much as one wanted. The emphasis was on eating slowly, chewing well and enjoying each morsel by concentrating on the food. Breakfast would be light and nourishing. Lunch was lentils, chapatti (Indian bread), two vegetables, one green, rice, always something with curds. Tea-time was milk or tea and fruits and snacks.

What did you discover?

One of the main concepts of Vipassana is that of impermanence, so when I felt sad, I knew it would pass. Emotions came and went: happiness, agitation, sometimes frustration, satisfaction, gratitude... I cried a lot, sometimes from joy.

You cried from joy?

Well, I asked the teaching assistant a question about the technique and she said, "Agitations arise only to pass." And I thought that apt and I cried... I was happy and I wanted to be happy but I cried because I knew, like all emotions, it would pass, as would my tears. It made me feel strange and confused and exhilarated. It made me feel gloriously unconnected, sort of freed me from responsibility and expectations.

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