When the Prodigal Son or Daughter Is Yours

God's Love Never Fails

The parable of the prodigal son (Luke 15: 11 – 31) is a familiar one to many — sometimes because we’ve been the person who has broken our parent’s heart ourselves, other times because we are that hurting parent.

The principle message of the story is that, from the perspective of God our Father, all of us are prodigal sons, running away from His love and goodness, grace and mercy. Some of us, realizing that we no longer want to feed pigs anymore, decide to come back to our Father’s house. And like the man in the story who watches constantly for his son’s return, God enfolds us in His arms and love, announcing to all that His child “was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.” (Luke 15: 31)

Some people live this parable in real time, and it lasts a lot longer than nine paragraphs in the Bible. If this is your story, here are a few things to keep in mind.

There are other people, who need you, in your life

If there are additional children, especially still in the home, don’t force them to live their lives constantly in the shadow of their sibling’s actions. Yes, you are brokenhearted, but your youngest child’s birthday is coming up, and she deserves a celebration.

The prodigal son of Jesus’ story physically left, and while his father never stopped looking for his return, he also didn’t stop living his own life. He had a farm to run, and at least one other child.

It’s a toss-up whether it’s easier to have the prodigal out of sight and far away, or near enough that you are constantly updated as to the latest scrape, but either way, there’s not much you can do for someone who isn’t listening and doesn’t want to change direction right now. You major activity is to pray.

Learning Forgiveness

There will be people who encourage you to deal harshly with the prodigal, summarily rejecting him or her because they are ”sinful and rebellious,” and your duty as a Christian demands that you show tough love.

Tough love is tough not because it’s grim and rigid, but because it’s painfully difficult. (It’s also a pop psychology phrase that you don’t find in the Bible.)

Luke 17: 3 tells us, “If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. If he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times, comes back to you and says, ‘I repent,’ forgive him.”

By all means, lock your house, put away money and charge cards, protect yourself from your prodigal when they are in an untrustworthy state, but always remember — this is your child. Ultimately, you don’t want to sever them from the possibility of ever having a relationship with you, when they come back to their senses.