6 Ways to Help Teens Doubting Their Faith

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Navigating the world of faith as a teenager in the twenty-first century can be overwhelmingly confusing, complicated, and tenuous. We’re establishing our intellectual independence and our ethical convictions, and we’re brimful of questions. We want unshakeable and unwavering faith, but it’s the very teens who grew up in the church (or who are recent converts) that often face the most doubts about the gospel and Christianity. These teens are most assuredly saved and have no legitimate cause for doubt, yet they persistently wrestle with it.

Of course, they’re not alone. Christians throughout the ages have struggled with assurance and belief. Even the apostle Peter standing on a storming sea was infected by disbelief and began to sink (Matt. 14:30).

But teens need a particular kind of gospel-directed, love-motivated, gently-spoken instruction. Perhaps you’re a parent, pastor, youth worker, or teen yourself who wants to know how to counsel a doubting teen through this dark period. As a teen myself, here are six practical suggestions for ways to help.

Don’t belittle or shame them.

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If a teen has opened up to you about their doubts, don’t make them feel foolish or bizarre – because, chances are, they already feel like that. They feel like they’re the only ones in the world who have these questions, and they probably feel like there is condemnation in these questions. Give them safe space, and make them comfortable coming to you. Don’t respond with anger or panic. Rather, listen carefully, calmly, and patiently. They have opened up to you with vulnerability and honesty; respect that and love them through it. Don’t cheer them on in their doubts (see the following point), but listen to them with a gracious ear.

Show them doubt is wrong.

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All that being said, show them that doubt is unbelief, and that unbelief is sin. Jon Bloom writes about this well when he says: “Doubt must be dealt with like lust or any other unbelief that infects our faith. … Repent! Call doubt what it is: a distrust of God.” While it may feel different if a teen wanted to talk about a porn addiction or extreme insecurity, your response should essentially be the same when they confess doubt: Let me help you turn from this sin and trust in Christ. Doubt is poison to young Christians. It’s poison to any Christian! It distorts faith and calls into question the character of God and the truth of His Word. Counsel your teens to cut it off.

Point them to Scripture.

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But don’t just leave them there. It would be tragically unhelpful and unhealthy to answer their questions with, “Repent” and walk away as if that’s the end of the conversation. Respond to their doubts! Answer their questions. Lead them to the Bible. Show them that doubting may be common, but that it has no foundation. The Bible is clear that faith is a sure thing. If God has saved you, nothing can change that. And the troublesome questions that often lead people to doubt all have sure answers in Scripture. Not all of those answers are easy, happy, or simplistic, but they’re true. And that’s what doubting teens need most desperately – truth.

Acknowledge that faith is hard.

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Because faith is hard. Faith requires believing in something we can’t see. We can’t see God. But we can have rock-solid faith that He exists. That’s a key point. Still, for a searching, questioning, troubled teen, it can be helpful to authenticate their experience by reminding them that faith isn’t easy. It’s true and it’s right, but it requires the work of the Spirit – and that can be painful. In an increasingly secular society, teens will see faith mocked and misinterpreted, and that can fuel their doubts. But use the difficulty of faith to inspire and remind them of its beauty and value. Think about how Jesus responded to “Doubting” Thomas when He appeared to the disciple after rising from the dead: “Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed” (John 20:29). Blessed are those who have faith.

Give them community.

Christian teens need to be plugged into a local church body – just like all Christians. But young Jesus-followers especially need community. They need older, godlier, more mature Christians who can answer their questions and teach them truth. They need regular opportunities to see faith played out in word and deed. They need chances to serve. They deeply need accountability, for that’s where doubt goes to die. Mentors who are willing to come alongside teens and walk through life with them, celebrate their strengths, and call them out on their weaknesses can consistently discourage doubt and demonstrate trust, obedience, and faith. In the letter Jude wrote to the church, he offered a short but precious bite of advice to the believers: “Have mercy on those who doubt.” He was calling the community to collectively serve the doubting. And they were to do that with hearts of mercy and compassion.

Lead by example.

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Young people are consistently watching older people to figure out how to talk, how to reason, how to think, and how to live. Whether you know it or not, they are learning from your example. You can actually quash fears and encourage faith by simply demonstrating your own trust in God. Be vocal and open about your fears and struggles but regularly reiterate your belief in God and His control and goodness. Speak in a language woven with hope and joy; silence the temptation to model anger and unbelief. There is some truth to that old saying: “True knowledge is caught, not taught.” You are leading by example – the question is only what kind of example you’re being.

Modern teenagers are struggling.

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Modern teenagers are wrestling with doubting their faith – and you can help. In fact, you must help. We need your help. We need your gracious and supportive listening ear. We need your accountability and tough-loving encouragement to cut off doubt. We need your Scripture-fed answers to our nagging questions. We need you to acknowledge that faith is hard. We need you to support us, teach us, and have mercy on us as a church community. And we need your example of faith and trust.

But there’s someone else we need even more. Someone else who will help us. Someone else who will listen. Someone else who will convict us to cut off doubt. Someone else to who will give us an example of faith and trust. Someone else who will give us an assurance only He can bring. We need Jesus. So the best way you can help teen who are doubting their faith is to point them to Jesus. At every turn, point them to Jesus.

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