7 Spiritual Steps That Teach Family Togetherness

Mission: Appreciation!

By Hillary Fields

In "Space Chimps," out on DVD and Blu-ray November 25th from Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment, Ham, a well-meaning slacker, is given a daunting mission to rid a faraway planet of evil. As the grandson of the first primate sent to space, this lovable ne'er-do-well must prove he, like his famous predecessor, has the "Right Stuff." Unfortunately, if he’s going to find it, he’ll need a lot of support.

Through humor, the movie highlights how family expectations can lead to some uncomfortable—even painful—family roles. In real life, it's not always so easy to recognize and address these issues when it's our family dynamic in question, but it is vitally important. If we take each others' contributions for granted, it can lead to resentments and feelings of estrangement. Remember, even the littlest of us has something to offer!

Here are some simple, spiritual tips to help you appreciate your family members more.

Give Everyone a Role

First, convene a weekly family meeting. Get everyone settled comfortably in the living room or around the kitchen table. (Serving some hot cocoa or tea couldn't hurt!) Then share openly about any short-term goals, like planning for the upcoming school year or celebrating somebody's birthday. Invite your loved ones to suggest ways they think they can best pitch in. Let them offer, instead of just assigning tasks or leaving everything to the grownups. You can always renegotiate the chore-distribution, but you'll be surprised how excited everyone gets when they feel part of a team. It's also a fantastic idea to discuss the greater mission of your family. What do you dream of for your loved ones? What values do you hold dear? Ask each family member how they feel they can contribute. The more invested your family is in its own success, the tighter the bond you'll enjoy.

Take On Charitable Activities

Nothing brings a family together better than joining a cause or supporting a worthy charity. There are so many great options out there, it’s easy to get your whole family involved. Here are just a few ideas you can all work on together:

Help your kids make crafts for the elderly in your local nursing home.
Sew "get-well" quilts for children in your neighborhood hospital.
Write greeting cards to soldiers serving abroad.
Donate canned goods to a local shelter.
Participate in your local Meals On Wheels program.

Charitable activities provide a great lesson on the power of togetherness and the positive effect one family can have on the wider world. Plus, the feel-good vibes will lead to hugs and smiles all around!

Take a Vacation

Many of us have fond memories of trips we took with our folks when we were kids. (Some of us have not-so-fond memories too.) Whatever your take on the family trip, there's no arguing family vacations are a time-honored tradition. What can get lost in the luggage, however, are the unique opportunities for togetherness they provide. Much more so than our day-to-day routines, vacations offer time for relaxing, laughing and experiencing new things as a family, providing stories you'll talk about in years to come and widening your family's horizons.

Holidays are also opportunities to see a different side of Mom or Dad (the kids too). Take time to absorb your relatives' reactions to new experiences and appreciate their joy. Notice what makes your loved ones tick. The memories will last as long as those snapshots of everyone waving from the rim of the Grand Canyon.

Try Out a Hobby

Nobody's expecting your family to become the next Double Dutch sensation or Bridge tournament champions, but trying out a new hobby together can really put the "fun" in the "functional" family. Maybe the local gym has a climbing wall where you can try out your rock-climbing—and team-building—skills. Or maybe there's a pottery studio nearby where everyone can get their hands dirty playing with clay. Maybe Junior is a chess whiz and can teach the rest of the family the right moves. Or maybe Mom is a scrabble pro or Dad kicks butt at crossword puzzles.

Whatever activity you choose, the most important part is doing it together. The combination of common interest and team spirit provides bonding opportunities galore.

Get Physical (Activity, That Is!)

What do we mean when we suggest "getting physical" with your family? Well, this can be as ambitious as trying out a team sport or as laid-back as just taking an evening stroll together with the dog. You can set aside one night a week and form a bowling league, or strap on some rollerblades and spend Sunday in the park whizzing around at top speed. Join a gym to sweat out tensions together or visit out a yoga studio for some family Zen.

Like the previous tip, this suggestion really highlights teamwork. But it also functions in a more basic way—by inviting your endorphins to do the work. When you get your body moving, it sends signals to the reward centers of your brain. And when you get the whole family in on the act, you’ll all reap the benefits together. Good health, good vibes, and quality time… what's not to enjoy?

The Family That Prays Together...

…Stays together. It's an old saying that's stuck around for good reason. Day-to-day matters may occupy most of our attention, but it's important to take a step back and focus on the spiritual side whenever possible. The love that binds a family must be fed to flourish, and spirituality makes great nourishment. Whatever your family's tradition or practice, get everyone involved, whether attending a service, gathering to say a blessing at the table, meditating together or forming a prayer chain for loved ones far away. Expressing love of the divine helps us get in touch with what's divine in each other and appreciate our everyday blessings all the more.

Keep Up with Traditions

Every family has its own traditions, from that super-secret pumpkin pie recipe grandma passed down to the way we decorate the house just so come holiday time. Each family is unique, and so are our cherished rituals. When you think about it, our traditions are really a vital part of our identity as a family, and that's why it's so important to celebrate them in our own time-honored way. Some keep a scrapbook of reunions past and favorite family activities to show future generations. Others tell stories or collect photos and cherished heirlooms to teach the kids how strong the bonds of family are.

And some, like the Costanza family from TV’s "Seinfeld," usher in their own brand-new holiday traditions to encourage family unity. (Remember "Festivus, the holiday for the rest of us"?) Whatever works for you, keep up with it!

Watch Trailer: 'Space Chimps'

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