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2018-03-07

Make God Laugh

You know how to you make God laugh? Tell him your plans.
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God first went to the Egyptians and asked them if they would like a commandment. "What's a commandment?" they asked. "Well, it's like, THOU SHALL NOT...
Following the resurrection, the disciples were still scattered about Jerusalem and the surrounding villages. John finds Peter and runs up to him. Excitedly...
A woman takes her 16-year-old daughter to the doctor. "Okay, Mrs. Jones, what's the problem?" The mother says, "It's my daughter, Debbie. She keeps getting...
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Moses: “How are we going to get across the sea? The Egyptians are close behind us!” General of the army: “Normally, I’d recommend that we build our own...
A father asked his little boy if he knew how a person gets saved. “We’ll be saved by going to our church every Sunday,” the boy said without hesitation....
A preacher, newly called to a small country town, needed to mail a letter. Passing a young boy on the street, the pastor asked where he could find the...
A young pastor was sitting in a restaurant eating lunch. He opened a letter he’d just received that morning from his mom. As he opened it a twenty-dollar...
An elderly woman in her nineties had a visitor from her church come to see her at the nursing home. “How are you?” the visitor asked. “Oh,” said the elderly...
A wealthy man died and went to heaven. He was met at the Pearly Gates by Saint Peter who led him down the streets of gold. They passed mansion after mansion...
Dear Member, We do not have a happy report, as we have not been able to find a suitable candidate for pastor of our church thus far. We do, however, have...
An old country preacher was fishing one afternoon when he noticed a frog sitting next to him. The frog said, “Mister, I’ve had a spell cast on me. If...
Three police officers were standing in line at the Pearly Gates. Saint Peter asked the first officer, “What did you do with your life?” “I was a police...
A young girl was attending her first wedding, watching the proceedings with interest for a while before growing restless. The groom stood at the altar...
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