{"id":997,"date":"2018-11-01T13:47:53","date_gmt":"2018-11-01T13:47:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/yourmorningcupofinspiration\/?p=997"},"modified":"2018-11-01T13:47:53","modified_gmt":"2018-11-01T13:47:53","slug":"getting-hard-times","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/yourmorningcupofinspiration\/2018\/11\/getting-hard-times.html","title":{"rendered":"Getting Through Hard Times"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"alone-boulders-idyllic-426893\"<\/a><\/p>\n

If there is anything I\u2019ve learned in life, it is this: We do not grow in character during the good times. When life is easy, when there is enough money to pay the bills, and when all our relationships are peaceful, we tend to become vain.\u00a0 We believe that things are going well based on our own efforts, and that is why we don\u2019t have any problems.<\/p>\n

Rather, it is when we go through hard times that our characters are tested and developed. In fact, we change, either for better or worse, depending on how we respond to hard times.\u00a0 We certainly have seen this in the public sphere.\u00a0 Malala is a young lady who was shot in the head as a child in Pakistan for promoting education for girls.\u00a0 Instead of becoming bitter and angry after this experience, she chose to become an even more fervent champion for female education, eventually winning the Nobel Peace Prize.\u00a0 Barack Obama grew up without a steady paternal influence.\u00a0 In spite of this, he decided not to lead a life of addiction to drugs or alcohol or to resort to bad behavior.\u00a0 Rather, he chose a life of public service which ultimately led to his becoming president of the United States.<\/p>\n

So, it is not the hard times that dictate who we become. Rather, it is our response<\/em> to those hard times that makes us who we are.\u00a0 In fact, I would argue that we need some resistance in life in order to achieve great things.\u00a0 Obstacles push us out of our comfort zone.\u00a0 They force us to do things we would not normally do, in order to achieve our goals.<\/p>\n

Below are ways to ensure that as you go through difficulties, you respond in ways that benefit you and that positively grow your character. Consider using some of these approaches whenever you face challenges in your own life.<\/p>\n

Be Helpful<\/strong>:\u00a0 It may seem counterintuitive that at a time when you need the most help, you should be helping others.\u00a0 But serving others will give you a sense of purpose during a time when you probably feel like you have very little control.\u00a0 You may not be able to control the bad thing that is happening in your life, but that does not mean that you are powerless.\u00a0 You always have the power to help others.\u00a0 When we serve others, that is God working through us.\u00a0 And what could be more energizing than having God use your life for good?\u00a0 Nothing.\u00a0 So instead of focusing on your problems or worries, focus on how you can serve.<\/p>\n

For example, recently, my husband was hospitalized. His medical condition was very serious, and I could have allowed the situation to overwhelm me.\u00a0 But instead, every day when I went to the hospital, I made myself useful.\u00a0 I helped the nurses with his care, I tidied up his room, and I made sure to research his medical condition so that I could fully understand what the doctors were telling me.\u00a0 By focusing on being helpful, I was able to redirect my energies toward something positive \u2013 serving my husband \u2013 versus something negative \u2013 worrying.<\/p>\n

Be Kind<\/strong>:\u00a0 Often, when we are under pressure, we aren\u2019t at our best.\u00a0 We are impatient or irritable.\u00a0 We lash out at others, instead of biting our tongues.\u00a0 But that kind of behavior helps no one.\u00a0 When we are rude or mean, the only thing that we accomplish is to hurt others.\u00a0 And others then (appropriately) view us as immature and lacking in basic self-control and manners.<\/p>\n

When we face difficult situations, God is testing our character to see how we will respond. Will we take out our troubles on other people?\u00a0 Or, will we show ourselves to be emotionally mature?\u00a0 Will we be kind to others, no matter how we are feeling at the moment?\u00a0 The mark of mature people is that they hold themselves to the highest standard of behavior, regardless of the circumstances.\u00a0 Tough times are an opportunity to show your maturity by treating others well, in spite of whatever stresses you may be experiencing.<\/p>\n

Behave Responsibly:<\/strong> It is easy when under stress to make excuses and let your responsibilities slide.\u00a0 But letting your house become a mess, failing to pay your bills and unnecessarily missing days of work is not going to help matters.\u00a0 It is only going to make matters worse.\u00a0 Instead, to the extent possible, try to stay organized.<\/p>\n

In times of high stress, it is easy to be forgetful. Making \u201cTo Do\u201d Lists is key, as is doing tasks that you\u2019d rather avoid.\u00a0 For example, paying bills is stressful.\u00a0 But missed payments will create a whole world of problems that you won\u2019t need in the future.\u00a0 Similarly, it may be tempting to take a leave of absence from work, but forgoing income is going to hurt you in the end.\u00a0 Better to meet your work responsibilities, keep your job and avoid going into debt.\u00a0 Moreover, your decision to meet your job responsibilities, even when you have personal issues, will not go unnoticed by your supervisors.\u00a0 That kind of dedication is the hallmark of great employees.<\/p>\n

All that being said, if you do make mistakes, be easy on yourself. No one goes through hard times perfectly.\u00a0 If you have ever been through a divorce or have experienced the loss of a loved one, you\u2019ll wish that you had done certain things differently.\u00a0 That is to be expected.\u00a0 We are all human, and stress is hard to manage for everyone.\u00a0 But ultimately, the goal is to come out of hard experiences as well as possible, with your life still intact, having grown in maturity, patience and compassion.\u00a0 That means being very aware of how you operate when under stress.<\/p>\n

If you are going through a stressful time, consider applying some of the above ideas. Realize that \u201cthis too shall pass,\u201d as all hard times do.\u00a0 Knowing that your stress is temporary, try to use the experience as an opportunity to grow as a person.\u00a0 Use it as an opportunity to develop your maturity and character.\u00a0 You may not see the benefits now, but you will see them in the future.<\/p>\n

(Photo Courtesy of Pexels)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

If there is anything I\u2019ve learned in life, it is this: We do not grow in character during the good times. When life is easy, when there is enough money to pay the bills, and when all our relationships are peaceful, we tend to become vain.\u00a0 We believe that things are going well based on…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":593,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-997","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nGetting Through Hard Times - Your Morning Cup of Inspiration<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/yourmorningcupofinspiration\/2018\/11\/getting-hard-times.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Getting Through Hard Times - Your Morning Cup of Inspiration\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"If there is anything I\u2019ve learned in life, it is this: We do not grow in character during the good times. 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