{"id":966,"date":"2018-10-20T16:31:19","date_gmt":"2018-10-20T16:31:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/yourmorningcupofinspiration\/?p=966"},"modified":"2018-10-20T16:31:19","modified_gmt":"2018-10-20T16:31:19","slug":"follow-your-own-path","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/yourmorningcupofinspiration\/2018\/10\/follow-your-own-path.html","title":{"rendered":"Follow Your Own Path"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"forest-forest-path-leaves-1112186<\/a><\/p>\n

If I could give only one piece of life advice, it would be this: Follow your own path. As a society, we have a cookie cutter view of what constitutes a successful life.\u00a0 Society says that successful people make a lot of money.\u00a0 They are happily married.\u00a0 They have more than one child.\u00a0 And they live in big houses and drive expensive cars.<\/p>\n

This singular view of success is pervasive. Years ago, I used to have a Facebook account.\u00a0 If there is a place which tries to fetishize the \u201chappily married, two parents, three kids with a house in the suburbs\u201d lifestyle, it is Facebook.\u00a0 I\u2019ll let you in on a little secret.\u00a0 Those vacation photos and cute kid shots that people post have nothing to do with the reality of their lives.\u00a0 It is a picture that people try to paint because they want to make all their \u201cfriends\u201d think that they have achieved society\u2019s standards of success.<\/p>\n

The problem with this view of success is that it makes a lot of wonderful people feel that they aren\u2019t successful because they don\u2019t fit into this mold. And it leads to a lot of big life mistakes.\u00a0 How many people get married even when they aren\u2019t compatible because they feel pressured to \u201cbe married?\u201d\u00a0 How many people have children when they don\u2019t have the skills to parent?\u00a0 How many people buy houses and cars that they can\u2019t afford in order to live like their peers?<\/p>\n

I remember being in my 20s, and by all accounts, I was reasonably successful. I had a college degree and a law degree.\u00a0 I had a decent job (nothing fancy) and my own apartment (again, nothing fancy).\u00a0 I was physically fit, well-dressed and kind.\u00a0 But I wasn\u2019t married.\u00a0 And I felt like a failure because my peers believed that being married was the true hallmark of success as a human being.\u00a0 What utter nonsense.\u00a0 I unfortunately bought into that nonsense.<\/p>\n

So, instead of spending my 20s being proud of my accomplishments, and enjoying the freedom of being single and childless, I fretted over the one thing that I didn\u2019t have \u2013 a marriage. What a waste.\u00a0 Now that I am nearly 50, I can say that marriage is nice \u2013 when it is a good marriage.\u00a0 A bad marriage is a nightmare.\u00a0 Similarly, being a mother is nice, though it is a lot of work.\u00a0 And having a comfortable home to live in and a good car to drive are nice.\u00a0 But when you own a home and a nice car, you are under serious financial pressure to pay for those things.<\/p>\n

Frankly, there are a lot of other things that are equally nice.\u00a0 Having a satisfying career is wonderful.\u00a0 Having great friends and good relationships with your family members is a blessing, indeed.\u00a0 Similarly having the ability to travel and see different places, experience different cultures and eat different foods is an incredible luxury.\u00a0 And being in a position to be able to serve your community is truly rewarding.<\/p>\n

More importantly, God’s purpose for your life may not include two kids and a three-bedroom house. God\u2019s purpose for your life may be for you to do something very different.\u00a0 Maybe God wants to use your life in a more far-reaching way.<\/p>\n

Just think about what our world would be like if Jane Goodall had chosen to get married, raise three kids and live in a flat in London, instead of going to Gombe National Park to study the chimpanzees? What if Mother Teresa had chosen to live in Italy and have a traditional married lifestyle, instead of going to India and founding the Sisters of Charity?\u00a0 Both women chose to deviate from our society\u2019s standards of success, yet God used their lives to achieve great things.\u00a0 They both have been true blessings in this world.<\/p>\n

Following your own path is hard. It means ignoring what your friends and family say is important, and listening to that still small voice.\u00a0 It is the voice that may very well tell you, \u201cGet married!\u00a0 Have two kids!\u00a0 You will be a wonderful spouse and parent.\u201d\u00a0 Or that voice may tell you, \u201cThere are poor, vulnerable children on the other side of the world.\u00a0 They need you.\u201d\u00a0 Or that voice may tell you, \u201cI know your job isn\u2019t the highest paying, or the most prestigious, but I need to use you here to help others in ways that you cannot imagine.\u201d<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t listen to society. Forget about the messages sent by television commercials, friends or family as to what constitutes the successful life.\u00a0 Focus on figuring out what God wants you to do with the life He has given you.\u00a0 He has a purpose for your life that only you can fulfill.\u00a0 Follow your own path.<\/p>\n

(Photo Courtesy of Pexels)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

If I could give only one piece of life advice, it would be this: Follow your own path. 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