{"id":321,"date":"2016-09-12T17:47:31","date_gmt":"2016-09-12T17:47:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/yourmorningcupofinspiration\/?p=321"},"modified":"2017-02-18T04:13:06","modified_gmt":"2017-02-18T04:13:06","slug":"are-you-a-blessing-or-a-lesson","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/yourmorningcupofinspiration\/2016\/09\/are-you-a-blessing-or-a-lesson.html","title":{"rendered":"Are You a Blessing or a Lesson?"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"clasped-hands-comfort-hands-people-45842<\/a><\/p>\n

\u201cSome people come in our life as blessings. Some come in our life as lessons.\u201d \u2013 Mother Teresa<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

If you died today, how would people remember you? As a blessing or a lesson?\u00a0 To be honest, I would probably be a blessing for some and a lesson for others.\u00a0 But I would like to become the type of person who is a blessing to everyone that I encounter.<\/p>\n

We often don\u2019t think about our effect on other people. We instead pay a lot of attention to how others are affecting us.\u00a0 But that shouldn\u2019t be our focus.\u00a0 If we spent less time focusing on how others are treating us, and more time focusing on how we are treating others, what would our world look like?\u00a0 It would probably look a lot better than it does today.<\/p>\n

There are many things that we can do to stop being lessons and start being blessings to others. Consider the following:<\/p>\n

Stop Criticizing and Start Encouraging: <\/strong> A quick way to lose friends and alienate family members is to be critical.\u00a0 A good rule of thumb is this: Don\u2019t criticize other people.\u00a0 Why?\u00a0 Because it just makes you look small and mean.\u00a0 And here is a news flash: No one is interested in your negative opinions anyway.<\/p>\n

Another good rule of thumb is this: Compliment constantly. You should always be looking for nice things to say about other people.\u00a0 You want to be the kind of person who makes people feel good about themselves.\u00a0 There are a million ways to compliment another person.\u00a0 You can point out when someone does a good job.\u00a0 You can let someone know that you admire something about their appearance or a talent that they may have.\u00a0 You want to be the type of person who makes other people feel like a million bucks.\u00a0 Keep in mind the following quote by Maya Angelou in this regard: \u201cAt the end of the day people won’t remember what you said or did, they will remember how you made them feel.\u201d<\/p>\n

Always Say \u201cThank You\u201d:<\/strong> It is important to thank every person who does something for you, regardless of your relationship to that person.\u00a0 So just because you\u2019ve paid a waitress to serve you, that doesn\u2019t mean you shouldn\u2019t thank that person for bringing your food.\u00a0 Likewise, even if it is your child\u2019s job to clear the table, that doesn\u2019t mean you shouldn\u2019t thank him or her for doing so.\u00a0 Why?\u00a0 Gratitude is the oil that smooths the gears of our personal relationships.\u00a0 When you thank people, they feel appreciated.\u00a0 And when you make someone feel appreciated, they in turn will want to be kind back to you.<\/p>\n

Saying \u201cthank you\u201d is especially important in our family relationships. If you don\u2019t say \u201cthank you,\u201d to family members who help you, you get the reputation of being a user.\u00a0 And pretty soon, no one will want to do anything for you.\u00a0 Sometimes in family relationships, we feel like we are owed something.\u00a0 For instance, some kids think that their parents \u201cowe\u201d them a college education, a lavish wedding or an inheritance.\u00a0 Quite honestly, after you turn 18, no one owes you anything.\u00a0 So if you have a family member who helps you, thank them.<\/p>\n

Help by Anticipating Needs: <\/strong>If you know someone is going to have a need, fulfill it in advance.\u00a0 That shows a higher level of caring.\u00a0 For instance, let\u2019s say you know someone who is going to college but has limited means.\u00a0 If you are able, buy that person a laptop.\u00a0 Or give them a gift certificate to their college bookstore to help defray the costs of their textbooks.\u00a0 Or let\u2019s say you know a mom who is about to have a baby.\u00a0 After the baby is born, bring over some casseroles.\u00a0 Take food preparation of her \u201cTo Do List.\u201d\u00a0 Or if you have the financial means, hire a housekeeper for the first three months that she has the baby at home.\u00a0 There are many ways that we can anticipate the needs of others and then try to fulfill those needs.\u00a0 Those types of gestures make people feel that they are not alone.<\/p>\n

This week, take some time to honestly assess your effect on other people. If, by chance, you are being a \u201clesson\u201d to someone, change how you are acting.\u00a0 Then focus on the many ways that you can bless others with positive words and caring deeds.<\/p>\n

(Photo Courtesy of Pexels)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u201cSome people come in our life as blessings. Some come in our life as lessons.\u201d \u2013 Mother Teresa If you died today, how would people remember you? 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