{"id":2063,"date":"2020-09-03T12:34:20","date_gmt":"2020-09-03T12:34:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/yourmorningcupofinspiration\/?p=2063"},"modified":"2020-09-04T01:45:59","modified_gmt":"2020-09-04T01:45:59","slug":"are-you-holding-yourself-back-in-life","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/yourmorningcupofinspiration\/2020\/09\/are-you-holding-yourself-back-in-life.html","title":{"rendered":"Are You Holding Yourself Back in Life?"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"holding<\/a>
Photo Courtesy of Pexels<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

So often in life, it isn\u2019t our circumstances that hold us back.\u00a0 Yes, we may have grown up in a dysfunctional household.\u00a0 Or we may have been raised in poverty.\u00a0 But I find that it isn\u2019t our circumstances that typically hold us back in life.\u00a0 Rather, it is our own life choices that hold us back.<\/p>\n

For example, my daughter has a friend who is extremely smart.\u00a0 In her younger years, her IQ was tested, and it was off the charts.\u00a0 She was always a top-notch elementary student.\u00a0 Then she entered high school, and she stopped making school a priority.\u00a0 Instead, being popular, dating boys and drinking alcohol were her focus.\u00a0 She had the brains to go to an Ivy League school.\u00a0 But instead, she is going to local college and is on a very bad track, all due to her own choices.<\/p>\n

This young lady is holding herself back in life.\u00a0 She is choosing to do those things that make her popular with her peers.\u00a0 But unfortunately, those same choices are blocking her from future success.<\/p>\n

My daughter\u2019s friend is not alone.\u00a0 We all make choices, to greater and lesser degrees, that prevent us from being successful and happy.\u00a0 The key to life is to make as few of those bad choices as possible!<\/p>\n

Below are some ways that you may be holding yourself back in life.\u00a0 Stop doing these things, and put yourself back on the path to happiness and success.<\/p>\n

Listening to the Opinions of Others<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Often, we make bad choices in life because we don\u2019t follow our gut and our hearts.\u00a0 Instead, we listen to others.\u00a0 The biggest mistakes I\u2019ve made in life have occurred because I chose to take bad advice.<\/p>\n

The problem is that most people don\u2019t have your best interests in mind.\u00a0 Instead, they are interested in your doing what makes their lives<\/em> easier.\u00a0 For instance, you could be in a completely miserable marriage, and folks, nevertheless, will encourage you to stay with your spouse.\u00a0 Why?\u00a0 It is because they aren\u2019t concerned with your happiness.\u00a0 People just don\u2019t like divorce.\u00a0 It is unpleasant for everyone.<\/p>\n

So, the best rule of thumb is to take your own advice.\u00a0 In your heart of hearts, you know what is the right thing to do in any situation.\u00a0 If you have a modicum of common sense, you know that being kind, working hard and living responsibly are good choices.\u00a0 And you also know that you should never tolerate being treated poorly by others.<\/p>\n

The reality is that we don\u2019t seek the opinions and advice of others because we can\u2019t figure life out.\u00a0 The right choice typically is obvious. We seek the opinions of others to support our desire to make bad choices.\u00a0 If you follow the bad advice of others, you are needlessly holding yourself back in life.\u00a0 Instead, do what you know is right, and do what you need to do to make yourself happy.<\/p>\n

Not Following Life’s Basic Rules<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Life is only complicated because we make it so.\u00a0 We all know that we should be kind and gentle toward our spouse and children.\u00a0 We know that we should work hard, save our money and be financially generous.\u00a0 Being respectful and considerate of others are no brainers.\u00a0 Of course, we should eat healthy foods and exercise.\u00a0 And we should refrain from smoking and abusing alcohol or drugs. \u00a0Everyone knows those rules.\u00a0 And anytime you violate those very basic rules, you are holding yourself back in life.<\/p>\n

For example, in every job I\u2019ve had, I\u2019ve seen people get fired.\u00a0 And it typically has nothing to do with their work performance.\u00a0 The people who get fired are the ones who are rude and difficult.\u00a0 They may be smart and capable.\u00a0 But they can\u2019t seem to follow the basic rule that you have to treat others with kindness and respect.<\/p>\n

So many people go through life wondering why they can\u2019t get ahead professionally, or why their relationships with their family members are strained.\u00a0 It isn\u2019t complicated.\u00a0 They simply refuse to follow the basic rules of life.\u00a0 If you don\u2019t work hard, and if you aren\u2019t kind and respectful toward your spouse and children (and other people, generally), your life will be a mess.\u00a0 Period.<\/p>\n

You have to walk the straight and narrow in life.\u00a0 If you skirt life\u2019s basic rules, you will be holding yourself back for no good reason.<\/p>\n

Holding Yourself Back by Procrastinating<\/strong><\/h3>\n

We all have goals in life.\u00a0 Perhaps we want to lose weight and feel healthier.\u00a0 Maybe we want a new career, or we want to learn a new skill.\u00a0 None of that comes without hard work.\u00a0 The challenge is that hard work is not nearly as much fun as watching television while eating a bag of chips!<\/p>\n

So, we procrastinate.\u00a0 We come up with a billion reasons as to why we just don\u2019t have the time or energy to do the hard work.\u00a0 And by delaying and making excuses, we hold ourselves back from achieving our goals.<\/p>\n

The only way to achieve your full potential in life is to take action.\u00a0 For example, the only reason that I am a writer is because I do the hard work of writing \u2013 every single day<\/em>.\u00a0 Would it be a lot easier to spend my time reading books and sipping tea?\u00a0 Of course.\u00a0 But writers write.<\/p>\n

If I wanted to procrastinate, I could easily come up with excuses for why I don\u2019t have time to write each day.\u00a0 I have a million and one things going on in my life.\u00a0 In fact, I always have been a busy person.\u00a0 Not once in my life have I ever said, \u201cI\u2019m bored.\u201d\u00a0 Frankly, I cannot imagine uttering those words.<\/p>\n

In spite of being busy, I choose not to make excuses. \u00a0I don\u2019t procrastinate or avoid writing because I my goal is to be a writer.\u00a0 And as I said, writers write.<\/p>\n

So, if you really want something in life, take action.\u00a0 Don\u2019t hold yourself back with excuses for not acting, and miss out on accomplishing your dreams.\u00a0 As the Nike ad says, \u201cJust do it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Most of the time, we are the ones who hold ourselves back from achieving our full potential in life.\u00a0 We hold ourselves back with bad choices or inaction.\u00a0 Don\u2019t fall into those traps!\u00a0 Make great choices in life and live your best life possible. (To read about creating achievable goals, click here<\/a>.)<\/p>\n

Email: meerabelle@meerabelledey.com<\/p>\n

If you would like to receive my Free E-Book, “The Confidence Course,” and sign up for my weekly newsletter, go to meerabelledey.com<\/a>.<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

So often in life, it isn\u2019t our circumstances that hold us back.\u00a0 Yes, we may have grown up in a dysfunctional household.\u00a0 Or we may have been raised in poverty.\u00a0 But I find that it isn\u2019t our circumstances that typically hold us back in life.\u00a0 Rather, it is our own life choices that hold us…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":593,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2063","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nAre You Holding Yourself Back in Life? - Your Morning Cup of Inspiration<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"So often in life, it isn't our circumstances that hold us back. 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