{"id":1680,"date":"2020-02-21T12:53:06","date_gmt":"2020-02-21T12:53:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/yourmorningcupofinspiration\/?p=1680"},"modified":"2020-08-31T21:10:24","modified_gmt":"2020-08-31T21:10:24","slug":"making-tough-choices-with-confidence","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/yourmorningcupofinspiration\/2020\/02\/making-tough-choices-with-confidence.html","title":{"rendered":"Making Tough Choices with Confidence"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"making<\/a>
Photo Courtesy of Pexels<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

We all, on occasion, have to make tough choices in life.\u00a0 We may have to choose whether or not to stay in a relationship.\u00a0 Or we may have to choose whether to relocate or change our job.\u00a0 Whenever we make such choices, not only do we have to think about ourselves, but we also have to consider the impact of our decision on others.\u00a0 Balancing our needs and the needs of others isn\u2019t easy.<\/p>\n

However, once you\u2019ve decided what the right<\/em> choice is, you need to be confident in that choice.\u00a0 You need to trust your judgment because, ultimately, it is your life<\/em>.\u00a0 And, once you become an adult, you get to choose how to live it.<\/p>\n

Below are some ways to be confident in your choices so that you will feel good about them.<\/p>\n

Stop Worrying about What Others Will Think<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Most of us reasonably feel guilty if our decisions inconvenience others, even in the slightest way.\u00a0 However, it isn’t always possible to make decisions that benefit everyone.\u00a0 As a result, to be happy in life, you have to become comfortable with the fact that sometimes you will have to make choices that are unpopular.<\/p>\n

For instance, I have a friend who currently lives in a gorgeous home.\u00a0 It is an enormous, historic home in a beautiful part of the country.\u00a0 However, he is single man with two kids, and the upkeep of such a large house exhausts him.\u00a0 So, recently he decided to sell his house and move into a condo.<\/p>\n

Now you would think that everyone would support him in this obvious choice to better his life.\u00a0 Well, you would be wrong.\u00a0 His kids, his ex-wife, and his family are all upset with him for selling the house.\u00a0 Of course, none of these people actually help with caring for the house.\u00a0 They just would like him to live there, so they<\/em> don\u2019t have to deal with any change.\u00a0 And now, because everyone is upset, my friend is losing confidence in his choice to sell the house.<\/p>\n

His situation isn\u2019t unusual.\u00a0 So often, when we make choices to better our lives, other people get upset.\u00a0 Unfortunately, most people don\u2019t want what is best for you.\u00a0 They want what is best for them.\u00a0 <\/em>They want you to maintain the status quo so that their lives don\u2019t change.<\/p>\n

In order to be confident in your choices, you have to be willing to upset the apple cart, so to speak.\u00a0 You have to accept that you may receive some negative feedback when you make choices to improve your life.<\/p>\n

Realize That It Is OK to Take Care of Yourself<\/strong><\/h3>\n

To be happy, you have to learn to take care of yourself.\u00a0 And you need to get used to the fact that others may not always support you in that choice.<\/p>\n

For example, I have a friend who got divorced a couple of years ago.\u00a0 She was in a bad marriage and was just miserable.\u00a0 Her husband was moody, critical and often depressed.\u00a0 As a result, her days were fraught with stress.\u00a0 So, to preserve her sanity, she filed for divorce.<\/p>\n

Now you would think that her friends and family members would have encouraged her.\u00a0 You would think that they would have wanted what was best for her.\u00a0 Unfortunately, that wasn\u2019t the case.<\/p>\n

My friend had upset everyone\u2019s apple cart.\u00a0 By getting divorced, she made them feel uncomfortable.\u00a0 <\/em>Unfortunately, people can be very selfish.\u00a0 As a result, she had very little support during a time when she so desperately needed it.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll tell you what I told her.\u00a0 \u201cYou need to take care of yourself.\u00a0 You cannot go through life being miserable just so that others aren\u2019t inconvenienced.\u201d<\/p>\n

At the end of the day, my friend got divorced.\u00a0 She figured that if she didn\u2019t, she eventually would become a shell of a person.\u00a0 The end of the story is that now she is very relaxed and happy.\u00a0 But she only found happiness by having the courage to choose to take care of herself.<\/p>\n

Accept that Tough Choices Involve Sacrifice<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Tough choices by definition involve sacrifice.\u00a0 If they didn\u2019t, they wouldn\u2019t be \u201ctough.\u201d\u00a0 They\u2019d be easy.<\/p>\n

Anytime you make a choice, you are picking one thing and giving up another.\u00a0 For example, I used to live overseas, and I got to know many people who were lifelong expats.\u00a0 These were people who chose to live and work outside of their home countries.<\/p>\n

There is a lot to be said for the expat lifestyle.\u00a0 It is interesting.\u00a0 You live in a different culture, and you get to meet people from all over the world.\u00a0 And it certainly makes for good cocktail conversation (\u201cHey, let me tell you about the year I spent in Nepal!\u201d).\u00a0 However, that lifestyle doesn\u2019t come without sacrifice.<\/p>\n

If you live in another country, then you don\u2019t see your family as frequently as you would if you lived in their same town or state.\u00a0 That means that your relationships with your family members aren\u2019t going to be close.\u00a0 They’ll be friendly, but they won\u2019t be close.\u00a0 That is because when you live overseas, you aren\u2019t a part of the fabric of their daily lives.<\/p>\n

Nevertheless, lots of people choose the expat lifestyle because they are OK with making that sacrifice.\u00a0 They are OK with having a somewhat distant relationship with their family.\u00a0 And that is the key to making tough choices.\u00a0 You have to accept that there will be some things that you will give up.\u00a0 Unfortunately, you can\u2019t have it all.\u00a0 You can\u2019t live in Paris, France and be extremely close with your mom in Des Moines, Iowa.\u00a0 That isn\u2019t possible.<\/p>\n

The bottom line is that making tough choices isn\u2019t easy for any of us.\u00a0 However, don’t worry if your choices aren\u2019t popular.\u00a0 Sometimes the right choice isn\u2019t the popular choice.\u00a0 And accept that tough choices will involve some sacrifice.\u00a0 But when you make tough choices, know that ultimately, if they are the right choices<\/em>, your life will be better for it.\u00a0 (To read more about making good decisions, click here<\/a>.)<\/p>\n

Email: meerabelledey@meerabelledey.com<\/p>\n

To sign up for my free weekly newsletter go to meerabelledey.com<\/a>.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We all, on occasion, have to make tough choices in life.\u00a0 We may have to choose whether or not to stay in a relationship.\u00a0 Or we may have to choose whether to relocate or change our job.\u00a0 Whenever we make such choices, not only do we have to think about ourselves, but we also have…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":593,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1680","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"\nMaking Tough Choices with Confidence - Your Morning Cup of Inspiration<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Making tough choices isn't easy for anyone. 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