{"id":94,"date":"2009-07-13T11:07:59","date_gmt":"2009-07-13T11:07:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/yourdailyspiritualstimulus\/2009\/07\/managing-money-problems-in-your-marriage.html"},"modified":"2009-07-13T11:07:59","modified_gmt":"2009-07-13T11:07:59","slug":"managing-money-problems-in-your-marriage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/yourdailyspiritualstimulus\/2009\/07\/managing-money-problems-in-your-marriage.html","title":{"rendered":"Managing Money Problems in Your Marriage"},"content":{"rendered":"

Today’s Money Coaching Monday is in response to Margaret’s call for help with her marriage. Here’s Margaret’s prayer request:<\/p>\n

“I am praying that God will step in and make situation turn into a
\npositive one and that my marriage can be saved. Throughout the marriage
\nI have made some really dumb financial decisions that have led to two
\nbankruptcies and other issues. My husband can now no longer deal with
\nmy issues and has ask me for a divorce. Please pray that God can make
\nour marriage work and it not go to divorce. ”  (read more….)<\/a><\/p>\n

Dear Margaret,<\/p>\n

Without knowing the details, it seems as though you suffer from some self-sabotaging money behaviors that are causing difficulties in your marriage. It’s important for you to know that there are reasons for your
\nbehavior that may not be obvious and you deserve help and support
\nin understanding the root of these issues. It may also be that your “money issues”
\nmay be a symptom of other problems in your marriage. <\/p>\n

Clearly you and your husband would benefit from the help of a Marriage Counselor or Money Coach. Investing
\nin the help you need and deserve is worth the expense and quite
\nfrankly, much less costly, financially and emotionally, than divorce.
\nOur relationships are so valuable and important, it’s critical that we
\nreach out and get the support we need.<\/p>\n

  Also, here’s a few tips that I recommend you take to help your marriage
\nthrough this challenging times:<\/p>\n

1. Forgive yourself (and your spouse) for your financial circumstances.
\nWhat’s done is done, forgive and release it. You cannot rebuild your
\nlives and the future if you are living in the past.<\/p>\n

2. If you’re heavily in debt and need help, contact the American
\nConsumer Credit Counseling, a non-profit organization that can help you
\nget back on track.http:\/\/www.consumercredit.com\/<\/p>\n

3. Contact the National Foundation for Credit Counseling and locate a
\ncertified credit counselor to in your area to help you. Remember, It’s
\nimportant to work with people who are properly trained and certified.

<\/font><\/font>4. Remember that your core money issues get triggered when you are
\nunder stress, but they most likely did not originate in your marriage. They
\nusually represent unhealed wounds from childhood that you each brought into the
\nrelationship. Have compassion for yourself and seek help to heal the wounds from the
\npast.<\/p>\n

5. It is so easy to focus on what’s wrong that we often forget to
\nremember what’s good in our  relationship. Make a list of what is
\nworking in your relationship and what you truly love about your partner.
\nShare this openly with one another. We all greatly need to be
\nacknowledged.<\/p>\n

6. Most financial differences are due to a failure to effectively
\ncommunicate our needs, fears and grievances, which tend to accumulate
\nover time. Learn to talk openly and calmly and without blame. If there
\nis an issue that is irresolvable, seek professional guidance.<\/p>\n

Here’s a prayer for Margaret and others who need help:<\/p>\n

Dear God,
\n
Please help me and my beloved to move past
\n
our personal and financial challenges.
\n
Show us the way to forgiveness,
\n
help us to release the past
\n
and awaken to the gift of today which brings
\n
new hope and opportunity to begin again.
\n
Help us to recover from our financial struggles,
\n
to become free from debt and learn
\n
from our past experiences.
\n
Please strengthen our faith in you and our relationship,
\n
heal our wounds and return us to the heart of our love.
\n
We surrender this you and know that it is done.
\n
And so it is.
\n
Amen.
\n<\/font>
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Today’s Money Coaching Monday is in response to Margaret’s call for help with her marriage. Here’s Margaret’s prayer request: “I am praying that God will step in and make situation turn into a positive one and that my marriage can be saved. 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