{"id":5354,"date":"2011-08-01T19:12:32","date_gmt":"2011-08-01T23:12:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/watchwomanonthewall\/?p=5354"},"modified":"2011-08-01T19:13:30","modified_gmt":"2011-08-01T23:13:30","slug":"hum%e2%98%bar-j%e2%98%bake-woman-lost","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/watchwomanonthewall\/2011\/08\/hum%e2%98%bar-j%e2%98%bake-woman-lost.html","title":{"rendered":"HUM\u263aR &#8211; J\u263aKE &#8211; Woman Lost"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><tt><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft\" style=\"float: left\" src=\"https:\/\/th127.photobucket.com\/albums\/p134\/ras619\/th_hotairballoon.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"150\" height=\"80\" \/>A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below.? <\/tt><\/p>\n<p><tt>She shouted to him, \"Excuse me, can you help me?? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am. <\/tt><\/p>\n<p><tt>\"The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, \"You're in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude. <\/tt><\/p>\n<p><tt>\"She rolled her eyes and said, \"You must be a Republican <\/tt><\/p>\n<p><tt><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright\" style=\"float: right\" src=\"https:\/\/th525.photobucket.com\/albums\/cc333\/Marcia029\/th_300_110333.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"160\" height=\"160\" \/>\"I am,\" replied the man. \"How did you know?\" \"Well,\" answered the balloonist, \"everything you told me I suppose is? technically correct. But I have no idea what to do with your information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me <\/tt><\/p>\n<p><tt><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft\" style=\"float: left\" src=\"https:\/\/th530.photobucket.com\/albums\/dd345\/PoliticalFreedom\/th_Democrat-1.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"160\" height=\"42\" \/>The man smiled and responded, \"You must be an Obama Democrat.\" <\/tt><\/p>\n<p><tt>\"I am,\" replied the balloonist.? \"How did you know?\" <\/tt><\/p>\n<p><tt>\"Well,\" said the man, \"you don't know where you are or where you are going.? You've risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it's my fault.\"<\/tt><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below.? She shouted to him, &#8220;Excuse me, can you help me?? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don&#8217;t know where I am. &#8220;The man consulted his&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":403,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[701,181,35,875],"tags":[1988,1987],"class_list":["post-5354","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-democrats","category-humor","category-obama","category-republicans","tag-democrat-woman-lost-in-baloon","tag-joke"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>HUM\u263aR - J\u263aKE - Woman Lost - Watchwoman on the Wall<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/watchwomanonthewall\/2011\/08\/hum\u263ar-j\u263ake-woman-lost.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"HUM\u263aR - J\u263aKE - Woman Lost - Watchwoman on the Wall\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below.? She shouted to him, &quot;Excuse me, can you help me?? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don&#039;t know where I am. &quot;The man consulted his&hellip;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/watchwomanonthewall\/2011\/08\/hum\u263ar-j\u263ake-woman-lost.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Watchwoman on the Wall\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-08-01T23:12:32+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2011-08-01T23:13:30+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/th127.photobucket.com\/albums\/p134\/ras619\/th_hotairballoon.gif\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Donna Calvin\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"HUM\u263aR - J\u263aKE - Woman Lost - Watchwoman on the Wall","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/watchwomanonthewall\/2011\/08\/hum\u263ar-j\u263ake-woman-lost.html","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"HUM\u263aR - J\u263aKE - Woman Lost - Watchwoman on the Wall","og_description":"A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. 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He continued that God wasn't important, wasn't real, and our parents just used God to impose restrictions on us because they were inadequate to parent effectively. I knew then I was going to be involved in a war and that I would have to be in Jesus Christ's Army. Even then, I knew the United States of America would cease to exist without the vast majority of its citizens voluntarily submitting to the Perfect and Good Laws of the Holy Bible. I am a woman who loves the Lord Jesus Christ. I am tired of seeing our LORD denigrated from the school house to the White House. I search the Internet for items that ought to serve as a warning to Americans and Christians all through America, but the nation seems to be sleeping. Wake up America! You are losing your freedoms, your children and your country. Wake up and help stop it!","url":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/watchwomanonthewall\/author\/dcalvin"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/watchwomanonthewall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5354","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/watchwomanonthewall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/watchwomanonthewall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/watchwomanonthewall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/403"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/watchwomanonthewall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5354"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/watchwomanonthewall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5354\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5359,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/watchwomanonthewall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5354\/revisions\/5359"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/watchwomanonthewall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5354"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/watchwomanonthewall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5354"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/watchwomanonthewall\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5354"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}