{"id":793,"date":"2013-03-17T14:18:54","date_gmt":"2013-03-17T18:18:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.beliefnet.com\/truthsyoucanuse\/?p=793"},"modified":"2013-03-17T14:20:10","modified_gmt":"2013-03-17T18:20:10","slug":"how-to-ask-the-right-question","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/truthsyoucanuse\/2013\/03\/how-to-ask-the-right-question.html","title":{"rendered":"How To Ask the Right Question (It Could Save Your Life)"},"content":{"rendered":"

In a recent talk Rabbi Harold Kushner, author of When Bad Things Happen to Good People, pointed out a unique feature of the Hebrew language. It contains two words for the one English word \u201cwhy.\u201d The two Hebrew words are maduah<\/em> and lamah<\/em>.<\/p>\n

Why do we need two words? Because each conveys a different attitude.<\/p>\n

\"asking<\/a><\/p>\n

Words Shape Our Attitude<\/strong><\/p>\n

Maduah <\/em>is passive. It is used by the person who asks, \u201cWhy did this happen to me? Why did God do this? Why is life treating me this way?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

It suggests we are at the whim of people and forces outside of our control. It echoes the biblical book of Ecclesiastes, which says, our work and our dreams are \u201cmeaningless, a chasing after the wind.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Lama<\/em> conveys a different attitude. Someone who uses the word <\/span>lama<\/em> is not asking, \u201cWhy did this happen to me?\u201d She is asking, \u201cTo what purpose is this event? What can I learn from it? Now that this has happened, how best can I respond?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

One kind of question leads to frustration and despair. The other leads to growth and change<\/em>. One looks for someone or something to blame. The other embraces responsibility. One looks backward. The other pushes forward.<\/span><\/p>\n

And asking the right question can make all the difference.<\/span><\/p>\n

Saving Her Life By Saving Others<\/strong><\/p>\n

Rabbi Sidney Greenberg illustrates this truth in a story of a hospital visit he once made. He was going to see a member of his synagogue who was ill.<\/span><\/p>\n

On his way to her room, he ran into a hospital volunteer. He couldn\u2019t believe this volunteer was there.<\/span><\/p>\n

She had just recovered from an awful cancer, and had gone through a divorce in the process. She had so much to be upset about, and yet here she was volunteering at the hospital.<\/span><\/p>\n

He asked her, \u201cWith all your troubles, where do you get the strength to help others?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cRabbi,\u201d she said, \u201cthis work saves me. If I didn\u2019t come here twice a week, I don\u2019t think I\u2019d be able to carry on at all.\u201d<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

Giving gives us life. It nourishes us. It holds us up when we feel like falling. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

The Dead Sea and the Sea of Life<\/strong><\/p>\n

We find proof for this lesson in the <\/span>very geography of the land of Israel<\/em>. Israel has two main bodies of water: \u00a0the Sea of Galilee and the Dead Sea. They are both fed by the Jordan River.<\/span><\/p>\n

Yet, they differ significantly.<\/span><\/p>\n

The Sea of Galilee is full of life. It has greenery, fish, living creature. The Dead Sea, as its name implies, has no life. What\u2019s the difference?<\/span><\/p>\n

The Dead Sea receives water, but does not give it. The Sea of Galilee both <\/span>receives <\/em>and <\/span>gives<\/em>.<\/span><\/p>\n

The Dead Sea is a reservoir. It keeps its water for itself. The Sea of Galilee is a spring. It gives so that it lives.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

So can we.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

To receive Rabbi Moffic\u2019s weekly digest of Jewish wisdom, click\u00a0here.<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

In a recent talk Rabbi Harold Kushner, author of When Bad Things Happen to Good People, pointed out a unique feature of the Hebrew language. It contains two words for the one English word \u201cwhy.\u201d The two Hebrew words are maduah and lamah. Why do we need two words? Because each conveys a different attitude.…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":507,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[319,320,129,318,321,199],"class_list":["post-793","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-coping","tag-dead-sea","tag-kushner","tag-questions","tag-sea-of-galilee","tag-tragedy"],"yoast_head":"\nHow To Ask the Right Question (It Could Save Your Life) - Truths You Can Use<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.beliefnet.com\/columnists\/truthsyoucanuse\/2013\/03\/how-to-ask-the-right-question.html\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"How To Ask the Right Question (It Could Save Your Life) - Truths You Can Use\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"In a recent talk Rabbi Harold Kushner, author of When Bad Things Happen to Good People, pointed out a unique feature of the Hebrew language. 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His book, What Every Christian Needs to Know About the Jewishness of Jesus was a 2015 best-seller. His upcoming book of devotions\u2014Shalom for the Heart\u2014takes short biblical passages and show they way they can help us make better choices and live with fewer regrets. With Rabbi Moffic, you will find an open, accessible guide to life\u2019s deepest truths. A husband and father, he graduated from Stanford University in 2000, and was ordained a rabbi in 2006. He leads a congregation in suburban Chicago. 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